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what type of toast should i have?
butter & jam
My mind has turned to mush.
word on the street is its highly CARCINOGENIC
also - don't go to bed with wet hair ,youll get PNEUMONIA and die
just generally be careful everyone OK?
Don't eat at all for an hour before going in the bath or you will die
There were more but I've forgotten them all.
I just laugh in her withered old face every time she says one
everywhere will smell like burnt toast
because I heard if anyone touches you in the temple you basically die
I heard that if you keep your legs crossed for three days then the arteries and veins will stop functioning and you'll become paralysed from the waist down but your arms will inflate and you'll look like a disabled popeye.
only someone completely BONE IDLE would do that and I reckon they deserve everything they get
maybe you're just going about your business, time flies, but then the next minute your being badgered by the Olympics Committee to join the wheelchair basketball in what is an unnecessarily dangerous sport.
Do you ever finish a post and think, 'I should look over that for mistakes', before remembering it's just one big mistake?
and once I had committed to crossing the legs there was literally no turning back
DVT or no DVT - it AINT GONNA HAPPEN
and NO- if you're not allowed to make a mistake at 1:24 what ARE you allowed to do eh?
so I can't wear jeans anymore.
You're right tho, to notice mistakes at this time would be political correctness gone mad
I covered it with my thumb all the way home in a 'YEAH - GO AHEAD PERVE ON MY THUMB IF YOU CAN' kind of way
and then bought new jeans the day after
I don't wear the new jeans so much - I think I love the attention
and didn't quite clear it and impaled my jeans on the spikes. At that moment a man walked past and walked through an open gate door I hadn't seen
I once gave BIRTH to a KID with a DOG for a HEAD
(he was also wearing jeans)
if you say JAY and PACK loudly, could it mean anything to you?
the whole jean was basically made up of a hole you couldn/t really see the jeans FOR the hole
I have no idea what JAY and PACK mean loudly, not even quietly. I mean seperately they OBVS have their connotations - jay I;m thinking J form 5ive and pack I'm thinking a set of something in a commercial setting but together? NUH UH NO WAY
made them sound like a bad version of Um Bongo
5ive alive or 5ive?
or the number 5?
my moneys on 5ive Alive
but that came waaaay before. I looked on wikipedia to check and everything.
5ive as a word is more commonplace than 3hree or 4our or 6ixtyfive
WHATS THAT ALL ABOUT
this is my opening gambit for my stand up show but I dont QUITE know how Im going to pronounce these in a way that differentiates them from their more traditional spellings
I am gonna be the female Demetri FOR SURE
Im gonna prepare my 5ive 4our 3hree 2wo 1ne slides RIGHT NOW and say 'hey guys why not use those ones in your carton-ed soft drinks or your boy bands eh? HOW ABOUT IT'
they will be rolling.on.the.floor.laughing
and to come out and to try and give a lesson in front of a hostile audience.
Make them sit tests and put their hands up and learn stuff.
I'll end up rolling.on.the.floor.bleeding
that would be awesome.
Beamish have interactive whiteboards, we could do a double bill.
why have they got these? this undermines everything they stand for in life.
horse and cart....check
old fashioned boiled sweets.....check
fucking INTERACTIVE WHITE BOARD..... check but also WHAAAAAAT?
its worth it though
BELIEVE YOU ME
it'll give you scurvy?
you can't take it back downstairs without breaking its legs and essentially killing it forever?
I FOUND OUT THE HARD WAY
that rings a bell.
If you collapsed a wall and then pushed it from the first floor so that it landed on its side.....what would happen?
I'm pretty sure I've just asked the unanswerable so I'm going to call it a night
dont' call it a night because you;d be wrong and GUTTTEEEED because its technically morning
I need to spend like 4 hours on the tube tomorrow, that is the best excuse I have.
The question above was to whether a cow could survive a one storey drop.
It's been fun
oh right, I though you were talking about a collapsed wall falling and to be honest I didn't care WHAT happened to it, I didn't think any cows were involved I thought we'd MOVED ON
its a shame though because we were nearly at the edge>>>
'Be quiet, be quiet at the back. Go and stand right at the back, go and stand at the back, stand at the back, stand at the back
now count to 10000'
i actually did this last night and i was a little bit worried i would be sick.my hair was straight on the left side of my head when i woke up.that was the worst of it
DiS ate my reply
Burnt toast, proposed to be a carcinogen cos it liberates organic molecules that are themselves proposed to be carcinogenic.
Something like that
I'm not even a big fan of this kind, normally, but I have a craving for it at the moment. Damn you, empty bank account.