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definitely come round then
I responded to the wrong gumtree add..
I only wanted the second hand bed frame
a club a few weeks ago to get my number. she messaged me that night saying she wanted 'to fuck me'. i'm friends with her on facebook and i can warrant she's fairly hot. amazing body. face is only a 6 though. she send me naked photos.
trouble is i've got exams this next week and if she comes over i'm going to be up late and i'm probably going to want to be a little drunk.
this dilemma is not really a dilemma and you're just a boastful cunt
my original post i thought someone might say this. fair point. i have met her. but she literally said 'can i have your number'. i was drunk and didn't remember what she look like and she had to be quick as apparenlty she was on a date at the time and her date was in the toilet. classy.
i say go for it
have sex with her.
HAS REAL PROBLEMS
doesn't make her dirty. it's normally girls that aren't confident about sexytime who tend not to be clued up about preventing stds..
"she probably has chlamydia if she has sex"
to destroy your rasta hat
But she will probably be mad.
she couldn't stay the night as i had to get up early, she said she could come round in 45 minutes, i didn't reply for like 10 minutes cause i was trying to decide and she text me saying 'you obviously can't make a decision... so another time'. fuck her! she's right though. FUCK! it's not going to happen. just another big wank then.
pussy was right.
Salvage it! Tell her you dropped your phone down the toilet and you've only just dried it off.
sent a text saying 'or you can come round mine for a quick one. you had me imagining stuff'..
update 2 AS WE SPEAK... text that reads:
'how big are you?' - i'm not even fucking with you... ahahaha
No Sex 2/1
Autoerotic asphyxiation 12/1
you would hope he learned from the death of david carradine..
this is how you do it ladies and gentlemen, always take the safe bet
Unlikely not but impossible
and you haven't posted them?
"on a plate" is the phrase that comes to mind.
MTFU FOR CHRISSAKES
i'm not a fan of the whole 'grow a pair' school of thought in general, but yeah.... :D
but it's ridiculously appropriate. Girl offers herself to you on a platter, what do you do?
a) ask the internet
b) phone your mum
c) blow your load
c) blow your dad
except you missed the bit about prevaricating so much that he misses his chance (which is what he secretly wants cos he's scared)
and then gets to mope about missed opportunities
SHE'S GOING TO BRING TWO OTHER MEN AND ROB YOUR HOUSE
i suppose i will finish this thread later
Now everyone get on www.last.fm/user/ronslunchbox and see what his smoochytime playlist consists of.
Now playing: Master Shortie.
Think he's telling us/her something?
Really don't think so
R. Kelly – The Greatest Sex 8 minutes ago
If you were worried/had to get up.
Make that offer NOW
i wish i had a cat with hands
and you'll badly regret this in the morning, and over the coming weeks
But come the fuck on. I can't believe you even asked us this before inserting 50p into the slot
i think she is going to shag you rotten like you havent been shagged before.. then she is going to get up in the morning, leave and ring you in 4-5 weeks, saying that she is pregnant and looking MONIES... she will then move into your house, ruin our relationship with your family and you will be left in a loveless financially draining relationship for the rest of your horrible horrbile lives
we're made for each other
congrats people. especailly the betting section
Then drag out the emotional post-mortem till Christmas. On your own, obviously. That's what I'd do.
on a river of spunk
yea i think its time.is your fiddeley bit going to be falling off in the next few hours?
"My washing machine is broken and I'm all dirty, wil you come ad fi it with your big tool?"
"Could I order a pizza for delivery, I need filling"
he played 'slow down' by bobby valentino. the lyrics:
Slow down I just wanna get to know you
But don't turn around
Cuz that pretty round thing looks good to me
Slow down never seen anything so lovely
Now turn around
And bless me with your beauty, cutie
It's pretty obvious, isn't it.
but it was worth it for the reading of the thread.
a robe and wizard hat. And possibly assless chaps.
has anyone actually heard from that boy?
i regret starting, she came round but it was all wrong. it felt like i had got a hooker round. anyway, i had to get her to leave. one night stands, fine but this was just weird. the maths of it is 1/2 pussy and 1/2 morals. i'd like to think the morals edge it. so to bed.
but well done you. you earn 100 points :)
so what? even if it feels like a hooker, it's a free one
(apologies for nt understanding the vernacular of youth)
you can save it by uploading those naked pics.