- Ashes to Ashes

All I know is that this is a spinoff of a programme about a man who went back in time to THE DAYS WHEN MEN WERE MEN, CARS WERE CARS, POLICE WERE POLICE, and everyone jizzed over it cos it was a nostalgiafest and they could remember it.

I was totally confused as to how it could still be going on, despite the fact the time travelling man isn't in it any more.

It had some of the worst acting I've ever seen.

- Primeval

An English Jurassic Park with Hannah from S Club 7 and cheaper CGI than probably Tomb Raider 2 for the PS1.

Shocking.

- Snog Marry Avoid

Still as good as ever. 10/10 TV. I just miss the dark-haired girl who used to press the screen to intercut the program.

- CRANK

Made Primeval look good. Jason thingybob says "I'm going to kick some black ass" and it has Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite.

0/10