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Anyone in the universe conscious at all? Talk to me.
I've spent too much time on 'guess her muff' and now my eyes her. 'beautiful flowers' my arse.
I may have a brandy before bed.
Yeah, I'm just back from the pub. It was depressing. At about half 11 a guy I knew in school walked in. I used to be really good mates with him and kinda worshipped him, he was really cool and good-looking, like a James Dean type. Haven't seen him in about two years. He's now kinda overweight and looks utterly lifeless. It was really upsetting.
I had a really hot ex deteriorate like that in a year or two. He dumped me on new year's eve. I loved every second of seeing him again (like that).
what's wrong with him?
you can't always worship your teen heroes :)
I also remember me posting this and wondering if i just dreamt it
then i remember you and drakey laughing at me :(
deja-vu r gay :(
drakey do you think this has potential
it seems like a heap of epic dreaminess
Actually every girl I've been with that I've met later has looked kind much better, I don't know if that's a shocking indictment on me, but yeah, it sucks. But I was reallyupset when I saw him. For the last two years I've imagined him racing from coast to coast over in the states in an old cadillac, sleeping with every beautiful girl he came across, looking moody and enigmatic as he took a glorious drag off his smoke. But no, he's a brick layer down the country living in a flat with three other guys. And he looks worse than me now.
Oh I wasn't so bothered, I was only sixteen so I snogged someone else that night and forgot about him pretty quickly.
No not much of an ego boost, like, I'm happy with the way I look and... And he always looked absolutely amazing before, i mean basically like this:
He could get it back if he found a bit of direction and a tread mill tho.
He gave me his number so I'm thinking I should start hanging around with him again and sort him the feck out. It could be like some great comedy film or something where we all learn lessons in the end and stuff.
but if I get to be Dylan Moran, I'm in there like swim wear.
I didn even know sir moran was in it! Must get ASAP.
go fuck yourself
this is why i avoided you for 2 years
I married someone who looked just like a ten year older version of him, sexy bad boy, also with 'issues'.
Stay the fuck away.
And with those works of wisdom and little backup, I'm hitting the sack.
Goodnight and take care x
I'm a MASSIVE hetero! but he should be restored to his former glory. for sure.
Will probs turn it off soon and strap on my headphones. I need to buy new ones. I need a job. I need to fix my crappy hair before I go hang out at my bf's. I need to study French like hell. Need anything, drakepress?
I'm kinda in the same boat. I sorted my hair out at the weekend but I need a job. And i've currently no girlfriend to hang out with... woe is me!
Too tired to think of anything to say though.
but feeling pretty dead. Went to watch Dirty projectors last night, ended up in some pub with people I'd met at the gig, chatting to some cross dressers, sniffing poppers (whoa flashbacks!) and then buying coke of the bouncer. Really pretty crazy, and to top it off I missed my bus and had to wait til 5 so went and had a £3 breakfast at a shitty cafe. Good night though!
I've never had poppers
They don't really serve any purpose. You been out Drakepress?
The nightclub across the road which has basically been like a drunken second home to us (despite being an absolute kip) was reopening tonight after being done up so there was massive pressure from people to head in. Well, I saw the place, the builders were still there at eight o'clock, the club is basically still a building site. I got chips and went home.
not the best, at least you got some chips though.
Been revising Old English, it's like being 11 and not being able to do Maths sums and knowing I never, ever will and the sense of incapability overwhelms me and I kind of want to cry. But I've been doing it for an hour and a half and it's slowly opening up. I think it's because I haven't put effort into anything for nearly a year now, so the thought of having to at some point gives me the willies.
If anybody can't sleep, there's a self-hypnosis track on Spotify which is AMAZING. Just put it on and get comfy in bed and you have the nicest, deepest sleep. Last three nights I've done it, and I've not woken up until it hurts to sleep any longer, and I've had really vivid memorable dreams. Last night I met a girl called Alice in a field watching a Werner Herzog film, she was robust looking and went to CSM, then I caught a gerbil and gave it to my old boss in Debenhams.
But I can't get spotify in ireland, for feck's sake!
I've never hear it before?
Irish way of saying fuck, basically ;)
knew to me!
I don't really think it hypnotises you, but she's got a lovely grandma voice and it me relaxes to David's Special Dreamland quite effectively.
it was actually pretty aces. I just dream I'm gettin with girls I fancy or else my whole family is dying. Fun times.
Are you Irish? you say feck! I'd not heard it til tonight, apparently its an irish thing? Crazy, new to me.
Do you reckon there was really that strong a narrative, or your imagination just linked up random bits as you went from a deep sleep to a light sleep? My dreams never have a proper story to them, just over-riding feelings - normally of anxiety.
somebody can look completely unlike the person they're meant to be, but you know who they're meant to be. Also I have dreams about girls who I love so much I don't want to wake up (I think most people have those kinds of dreams), but I can't remember what they look like.
Also I was trying to smoke in my dream last night, presumably to impress 'Alice' the art school girl, and it kept disappearing from my fingers. I think it was because my brain kept forgetting about that certain detail, and I kept re-lighting one because my body was having cravings cos I had been asleep for nearly 12 hours.
Are these imaginary girls, or real life ones? I had a thing where for about three weeks every morning I woke up, you know that bit where you just regain consciousness? I'd see this girl I used to be with, just her face in my mind. First thing I saw every morning, her smiling face. This was after she left the country, incidentally...
God I'm a sap!
it should be written in a 15 year old's journal. But I've spoken to other people who have a similar thing. It's almost always girls you don't know, they're just invented and you encounter them and it's like exciting love, butterflies. I've even had them when I've been madly in love with like a REAL girl. That's the nicest, dreaming about love and then waking up to it, rather than waking up cold, bitter and twisted in your own duvet.
^^ All quoted from some poor sap's journal, no doubt.
Was she a zombie? That'd be awesome.
Nah, she weren't a zombie, just all lovely and perfect. An zombie would have been awesome, rather than soul-destroying.
But I do that on a regular basis. Tomorrow, I'm going to run it on a gel, and hopefully get a good picture of it. Then, I will play with more DNA. And this post was pointless. Meh.
I think the dream posts above are pretty worthwhile, haha. somehow, I always end up degrading/losing my DNA, but I think it worked this time as my PI & I change the protocol thing & I had what I wanted yesterday--only it wasn't clean enough.
Also, I wish I could go to the pub for a drink. I'm jealous of you. Lol.
You don't need the pub, you need a screenwriter to bash that scenario into a sitcom.
And it's actually kind of funny lol.
I swabbed the inside of my mouth and did something with ice and sugar? idk I can't remember. I was more of a Physics man in school. And much much more of an Arts man.
PS. Ainsm, i'm almost drunk
I wasn't much for physics. If I wasn't planning on dental, I would have probably majored in English. It was always one of my favorite subjects (and now science seems to have sapped me of some of my writing skills that I used to have because I've gotten so used to formal writing).
PS. I wish I almost was...
Oddly I think journalism is sapping me of some of that. Maybe I shouldn't have left my English degree idk.
Oh, and by the way, at least tomorrow morning you'll feel great. I'm gonna wake up for a 10 o clock lecture with the smell of death in my mouth and the smell of smoke on my clothes. Not a good look.
Maybe, I should have listened to my 9th grade teacher, and not what everyone else recommended for getting into dental school. I actually might go talk to one of my professors and see what I can do to alter my writing back to more of how it used to be after I turn in my next paper.
How come you didn't stick with English?
Morning: listerine. :) Sometimes, I enjoy the smell of smoke on my clothes the next morning--usually signals I had a good night the night before. Mornings are never easy for me...no matter what state I'm in.
I don't know why I didn't stick with English. Well, I do, at the time I wasn't enjoying the course, thought it was a bit pointless and as it was only 1st year, dropped out for the rest of the year. Then thought "shit, I should really get a degree though" and journalism seemed the most obvious choice to go back to that September. I really just wanna go to New York or London and start actually writing at this stage.
How much longer until your journalism degree is wrapped up? Then you can move to NY or London. :) I think my Aunt may have worked for a magazine back in the 90s in London or something before she started writing children's books and had a family or whatnot...I may ask. But you should def. go for it. Lolz.
Then im outta here
I'm pretty excited for this scheduling--means I'll be nearly out of this place. AND I won't be taking nearly all science classes...I'm going to take an art history class, a history course, and I can't remember what else.
Hopefully after I'll either be in: Boston, Baltimore, Richmond, NYC, Philadelphia, or more ideally London or elsewhere around there...depending on what I do for dental school should I get in and stuff like that. All very un-exciting and blah.
but instead I'm writing in my long abandoned blog and watching family guy hooray for procrastination.
what's your blog? I'll check it out
so I'm too embarrased to post a link to it, I'm working on a less emo variation of it though which will be more music focused. I'll probably put a link to that one in my profile at some point.
I am, just about
You know that feeling when you dunno if people are being a teeny bit racist or just overly inquisitive about you? I felt that tonight. I dont usually feel it. Might just be me. Or them. Hmm
Im gonna go climbing tommorow (today)
but that's largely because I have such contempt for people, I tend to assume that they're ignorant enough to be asking their questions sincerely and not just taking the piss.
Im usually the same
Hows life treating you zapsta
I have a maths exam on Wednesday and another on Friday, and I'm only about halfway through teaching myself the material for each, mainly because I don't really care enough about what degree I get to motivate myself to do the work required for a good one, but at the same time, I don't want to feel that I've wasted all this time and money. But it now looks almost inevitable that that's what's going to happen, so I think I've just about come to accept it.
Still, I want to do as well as I can with the desire I have, especially if that means not having to go back into uni for resits in the summer (not least because my dad will probably beat me if I do). I feel kind of bad, because I was like my family's one great hope, but I was never going to be a hard-working career man, even if I did get a good degree, so I guess it just means they can be disappointed in me now rather than later. How about you?
Sounds bloody rough man
Its the last hurdle, fuck jumping it, run straight through.
I guess I mean, just go over everything you need to go over, go into the exam like a badass with ridiculous pomp and confidence and hope for the best after.
Look to the future I guess, its what im doing, I have no idea what I want to do, where I wanna go, but im pretty certain im gonna do everything for me, not my family or whatever - theyll have to accept whatever happens bla bla.
I gotta start revising soon, I guess its easier for me, cos I like the stuff ive learnt. My life isnt too bad at the moment I guess then.
and she's trying to add me rofl. Oh dear, facebook is NOT grandma territory.
It's your gran. Grandparents are cool as. And just imagine her face when she realizes you've rejected her :( you'd go straight to he'll!
Either way, I'll be up for the grand-grandma inquisition...ahhhhhh.
All mine are pretty cool. Just tell her to butt out or you'll break her thumbs or something.