I think I always knew, because when I was about 6 I felt a present before opening it and thought it was a Man Utd replica kit. I said to my mum and dad 'Oh, I think I know what this is!' with a big grin on my face. I opened it and it was just a Man Utd cushion. A fucking cushion. But somehow I knew it'd offend my mum and dad if I showed my disappointment so I was polite and said 'Yay! Just what I always wanted'.

Then again I'm not really sure.

How about you?

Cue comedy 'find out what about Santa Claus?!?!!?' reply.