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fave office quotes plz!!!!
do you like curry?
'2 lesbians probably.sisters.im just watching'
i love this programme so much
"If we dont have the right size flange can we butt-fuse?"
“In my experience, women who work in factories are slappers.”
its been in a box in a factory
Tim:Team leader don’t mean anything mate.
Gareth: Excuse me, it means I’m the leader of a team.
Tim: No it doesn't-it’s a title someone’s given you to get you to do something they don’t want to do, for free. Right? It’s like making a div kid at school milk monitor. No one respects it.
Gareth: I think they do.
Tim: No they don’t Gareth.
Gareth: Er, yes they do, because if people were rude to me then I used to give them their milk last, so it was warm.
oh dear god the office is amazing
they should be equal
you meant from the programme The Office not the office you work in.
gareth: "in this room i have special"
gareth: "no... in this room i'm a special"
tim: "needs child?"
Gareth: I can read women. You've got to know their wants and their needs. And that can be anything from making sure she's got enough money to buy groceries each week to making sure she's gratified sexually after intercourse.
"If it was up to me, the office would be full of them." (in the context of the episode it is fantastic
my fave, Gareth and tother bloke whos name I forget
“You know when he's fighting Chuck Norris in Enter the Dragon?”
“You not seen that?”
“Have you not, I can’t... that is a classic.”
“No, I’ve not seen him fight Chuck Norris in Enter the Dragon, I’ve seen him fight Chuck Norris in Way of the Dragon.”
“Ah, that’s what I meant, that's what I meant.”
“Is it? Why did you say have you seen him fight Chuck Norris in Enter the Dragon? He fight’s Bob Wall in both, but Norris is only in Way of the Dragon.”
“Yeah, I know, so when he’s fighting Chuck Norris-”
“In Way of the Dragon.”
“Correct. At last.”
He's actually a spy working for the Chinese government.
Yes, because if you wanted a spy you'd choose the world's most famous Chinese actor.
'oh for fu...'
this series gives me all those emotions all the time
i'd say, "milliagan cleese everitt"..."sessionsss"
tim canterbury.....canterbury tales.....chaucer........shakespeare
You're in the jungle, a trooper is down, gangrene's setting in, "Who's used all the penicillin?" "Oh Mark Pattson sir, he's got nob-rot of some tart"
Finchy: "Who did you say was the Cuban leader, who's been in power since the revolution of the nineteen-sixties?"
David: "Well, it's not important now, it was spur of the moment, just off the top of my head."
Finchy: "No, who did you say? Go on, tell them."
David: "......Fray Bentos."
he was rubbish....he was rubbish!"
I could catch a monkey.
'Gareth, I beg of you, don't go over there.......just don't go over there, please......Don't take Dirty Bertie, I'm begging you, if you must go over there, don't take Bertie, leave him here'
I can't be bothered to go find the actual quote, but it's words to that effect
'What am I doing in there with a dildo?!'
*bites into scotch egg*
will there ever be a boy born that can swim faster than a shark
If there is one person who's influenced me, someone who is a maverick, someone who sticks their finger up at the system, then it's Ian Botham. Because, Beefy will happily say: "THAT's what I think of your selection policy, yes I've hit the odd copper, yes I've enjoyed the odd doobie, but will you piss off and leave me alone, I'm walking to John o' Groats for some spastics."
and they say 'WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?'...and not in racist way
And when I've finished with Slough, there's Reading, Aldershot, Bracknell, you know I've got to-Didcot, Yately. You know. My-Winnersh, Taplow. Because I am my own boss, I can-BURFIELD.
All right, come 'round, look at my CD collection; you'll find Queen, George Michael, Pet Shop Boys. They're all bummers.
youre te wanker if anyone is mate