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Or post it on here if it isn'too shamefull. I'm bored...
A man that has half a big orange as his head walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why's half your head an orange mate?" to which he replies "Well, it's a long story. But I'll tell you anyway. I went down to me cellar at home and noticed this antique lamp. So I rubbed it, as you do, and this genie popped out. It granted me three wishes! So for me first wish I asked for an unlimited supply of money. Almost instantly my wish was granted and I ran to the bank to see that I had unlimited funds. For my second wish I asked for the world's fittest woman to be my wife and for her and me to be madly in love. Within a second the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen was at my side. And for my third wish I asked for half my head to be a big orange.