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I just got a letter re Marco Fella on facebook from a lawyer trying to find his ex girlfriend???!!!!

Rose-Kitten [Edit] [Delete] 112 replies 15:30 November 28th, 2008

I put myself down as 'attending' his court trial and now have had this lawyer guy email me: Letter here: No shite.

*************************
Dear Ms [insert my real surname here],

I read the court report about Mr Fella and I am trying to contact his (ex) girlfriend because I believe my company can help her.

My name is [xxxxx] and I work for [xxxx]. We represent individuals who find themselves under the media spotlight. We can deal with all calls and inquiries and, if she does decide to talk about the ordeal she went through, we would be able to negotiate a substantial sum of money for her.

Our service is free as our costs are covered directly by the media. So she can use the money to help her move on with her life.

We also ensure her story would be told how, when and where she wants it to be. We would get any magazine or newspaper which buys the story to read back every word so she can take out anything which she doesn't like before it goes to print.

I saw your profile on his Facebook group and thought you may have either been in a relationship with him, or know the lady that was.

Please feel free to email me at xxxxxxx.co.uk or call me anytime on xxxxxxx for a totally confidential and informal chat.

To get more of a feel for our company you can visit www.xxxxxxxxxx.co.uk.

Kind regards,

James

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I was never in a relationship with Marco Fella. I have never even met the man

Rose-Kitten @kissinginkansas | 28 Nov '08, 15:33 | X | ^ This | Reply
- I did.
  
  He bought me a drink and was a bit loud and scary.
  
  John_Brainlove @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:42 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - You're lucky!
    
    He could have been dangerously low on Mars and ready to explode in a finger-biting rage!
    
    sadpunk @John_Brainlove | 28 Nov '08, 15:43 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - Did he look like the finger chomping type?
    
    You can just tell sometimes can't you
    
    LordLuciusBanter @John_Brainlove | 28 Nov '08, 15:43 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - He looked like the punching people type.
      
      He seemed nice enough but I was oddly uncomfortable.
      
      John_Brainlove @LordLuciusBanter | 28 Nov '08, 15:45 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - I don't think it's odd to be uncomfortable being around someone
        
        who looks the "punching people type"!
        
        LordLuciusBanter @John_Brainlove | 28 Nov '08, 15:46 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        I disagree with the assessment. I didn't get any punching vibe from him or his brother.
        
        A mid-30s indie-looking bloke in Elvis Costello glasses drinking Smirnoff Ice doesn't really say 'vicious bastard' to me.
        
        He's a genuinely nice guy IRL. He sent me two seasons of 24 on DVD in the post to watch.
        
        TheoGB @LordLuciusBanter | 28 Nov '08, 16:19 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        this, he was very freindly to me, and made me feel at ease
        
        although he was very excitable.
        He was trusting and gave me a great mixtape
        
        creakyknees @TheoGB | 28 Nov '08, 16:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        that's ok then
        
        shadyadie @TheoGB | 28 Nov '08, 16:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        well he did seem excitable
        
        and maybe a bit loud but he didnt mention anyones unmentionables
        
        (although I think that he might have imagined that i said something to him that im pretty certain i would never say to anyone)
        
        creakyknees @shadyadie | 28 Nov '08, 16:43 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - aye,
    
    i was fucking terrified when we met - right at the peak of our online wars. nice chap IRL though.
    still, this is a massive LOL
    
    fishplums @John_Brainlove | 28 Nov '08, 15:45 | X | ^ This | Reply
I'll be his ex-girlfriend

Marco Fella Roped Me Into Sick Mars Bar Games!

yo_soy_welshmun | 28 Nov '08, 15:33 | X | ^ This | Reply
...

...that's not from a lawyer.

Stealthy | 28 Nov '08, 15:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
- ^ its definately a pile of balls
  
  no legal speak nor nothing.
  
  MissBass @Stealthy | 1 May '09, 09:24 | X | ^ This | Reply
yeah - you are right. my hangover is not letting me think clearly. chasers alright.

Rose-Kitten @Jack_El_Biscuit | 28 Nov '08, 15:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
^this

Call him and tell him an absolute pack of lies.

"Marco would ask me to dress up as caramel!"

sadpunk @Jack_El_Biscuit | 28 Nov '08, 15:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
Use the money to help her move on?

"I can't walk past a newsagents confectionary counter without having flashbacks..."

TheSoundofBastards | 28 Nov '08, 15:35 | X | ^ This | Reply
- "I'm at the end of my rope."
  
  Silentcommand @TheSoundofBastards | 28 Nov '08, 15:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
- "I now wear the smallest pants in universe in fear of a repeat attack"
  
  84joe @TheSoundofBastards | 28 Nov '08, 15:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - She's probably a never nude now.
    
    TheoGB @84joe | 28 Nov '08, 16:20 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - :)
      
      84joe @TheoGB | 28 Nov '08, 16:31 | X | ^ This | Reply
Dear James

You are a leech on the veins of society, unable or unwilling to produce or contribute anything of any worth or value to the world. If the action you suggest would in any way help you to continue doing the job that for some godless reason puts food in your mouth and shelter over your head, while thousands of good people lie hungry under the cold winter stars every night, then take for granted this resounding answer of FUCK OFF.

Smee | 28 Nov '08, 15:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
- Kind Regards
  
  Rose-Kitten
  
  Smee @Smee | 28 Nov '08, 15:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
- I still find it difficult that you are meths' brother.
  
  nice reply tho.
  
  Rose-Kitten @Smee | 28 Nov '08, 15:39 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - imagine actually BEING his brother
    
    Smee @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:41 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - well he was like my little brother for a long time when we were hanging out
      
      - - I used to see him daily at one point. It was nice back then. Now he doesn't even respond to my facebook invites or requests. Meh.
      
      I may have disowned him for good now.
      
      Rose-Kitten @Smee | 28 Nov '08, 15:45 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - hiya!
        
        meths @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:57 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        12 minutes.
        
        You're slipping.
        
        Rose-Kitten @meths | 28 Nov '08, 15:57 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        i fucking replied to your facbook
        
        how do you like that tough guy?!
        
        meths @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 16:00 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        *hug*
        
        okay okay.. sheesh...
        
        Rose-Kitten @meths | 28 Nov '08, 16:03 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        I've got Tough Guy by Beastie Boys in my head now.
        
        TheoGB @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 16:21 | X | ^ This | Reply
- ...
  
  I think it's time. Time for Merk.
  
  Stealthy @Smee | 28 Nov '08, 15:40 | X | ^ This | Reply
With every bite, this gets juicier

lemonbrickcombo | 28 Nov '08, 15:41 | X | ^ This | Reply
this gets better and better.

i haven't laughed so much at DiS in ages.

fishplums | 28 Nov '08, 15:43 | X | ^ This | Reply
- MARCO IN DAILY MAIL SHOCKER:
  
  http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1089897/Man-blames-Mars-bar-addiction-biting-girlfriend-wearing-Bridget-Jones-pants.html
  
  Rose-Kitten @fishplums | 28 Nov '08, 15:45 | X | ^ This | Reply
  - "...has now started an anger management course."
    
    :)
    
    sadpunk @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:47 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - the comments are the best. I only read the Mail online because of the retarded comments
      
      from middle Engerland. They are priceless and guaranteed to cheer me up on a rainy day.
      
      Rose-Kitten @Jack_El_Biscuit | 28 Nov '08, 15:51 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - lol @ dove_from_above
        
        sadpunk @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:53 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Is it due to DiS that his comment is highest rated?
        
        Or has he just struck a chord with Daily Mail readers everywhere?
        
        hip_young_gunslinger @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:04 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        ^^ this. dove, you are a King
        
        Rose-Kitten @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:06 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        ive voted for him 3 times now
        
        i expect you all to do the same
        
        creakyknees @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 16:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I hope that at Zonino there is a Mars Bar on the door for everyone.
      
      justanothersheeldz | 28 Nov '08, 15:45 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - and a thong
        
        moribund @justanothersheeldz | 28 Nov '08, 15:47 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Sling shot?
        
        Rose-Kitten @moribund | 28 Nov '08, 15:48 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Dismembered joke fingers?
        
        justanothersheeldz @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 15:49 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        or a pair of snickers
        
        TheSoundofBastards @moribund | 28 Nov '08, 15:49 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - whatever Bamos has got his flyer sorted
        
        creakyknees @justanothersheeldz | 28 Nov '08, 16:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Oh, you beauty. Could I do that? Would he sue me?
        
        bamos @creakyknees | 28 Nov '08, 16:47 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Nah, you'll be fine!
        
        DO IT!!
        
        sadpunk @bamos | 28 Nov '08, 16:49 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        I'm wary of what he'll do to me!
        
        I might just post a mars bar to 'Marco Fella, At His Relatives In The North East' to sweeten (lol) the deal.
        
        bamos @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 17:07 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Haha.
      
      I've got the same message.
      
      I posted on there this morning that I'd had a dream I was with a guy who had a heart attack in front of me last night. Which is true. But it wasn't Marco. And there were no mars bars present.
      
      Good old James! I'm tempted to give him a tongue lashing but everyone's gotta make a living somehow I suppose.
      
      MirriLondon | 28 Nov '08, 15:49 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - claims direct?
      
      meths | 28 Nov '08, 15:57 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - thongbard direct
        
        oh wait, that's loans. He might need that too, to fund his mars bar addiction
        
        lemonbrickcombo @meths | 28 Nov '08, 16:00 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I can't get over
      
      how absolutely random and hilarious this whole thing is. I was in bed last night STILL laughing about it. It's nuts.
      
      AND IT'S STILL GOING ON. Crazy.
      
      moker | 28 Nov '08, 15:59 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - It's not nuts...
        
        that would be snickers. Or topic...
        
        Reckoning @moker | 28 Nov '08, 16:04 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        :D
        
        Alex_b @Reckoning | 28 Nov '08, 16:35 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - I kept having random giggle-fits last night!
        
        :D
        
        sadpunk @moker | 28 Nov '08, 16:04 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        I'm having one now.
        
        It's truly the greatest thing of all time.
        
        crablin @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:08 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        stop talking about laughing it is making me laugh
        
        justanothersheeldz @crablin | 28 Nov '08, 16:10 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        It's not just the fact it WAS Marcofella
        
        it's not just the fact he got angry about his girlfriend wearing big pants, it's not just the fact that he went into a rage a bit her FINGER (I mean, what?), it's not the fact he went to court and blamed it on too many Mars Bars is the fact that ALL OF IT actually happened.
        
        It's possibly the most mental thing ever.
        
        moker @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:09 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        AND his name is actually Marco Fella
        
        sadpunk @moker | 28 Nov '08, 16:10 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        thong/mars/rope/anger management/ jobless fella/finger bite
        
        It shouldn't make sense, but it does.
        
        yo_soy_welshmun @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:16 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        and Bodmin
        
        adds something to it. Not sure why.
        
        moribund @yo_soy_welshmun | 28 Nov '08, 16:19 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        There's a beast
        
        that roams the moors down that way. Could it be...?
        
        vamos @moribund | 28 Nov '08, 16:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Inbred crazy cornwallity?
        
        Alex_b @moribund | 28 Nov '08, 16:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        for me it is his name actually being marco fella that tops the whole thing off
        
        ThingsThatFly @moker | 28 Nov '08, 16:17 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        what happened to mini Fella and Jules Fella. IMAGINE WHAT JULES must be thinking about all of this??
        
        Rose-Kitten @ThingsThatFly | 28 Nov '08, 16:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        :-(
        
        shadyadie @Rose-Kitten | 28 Nov '08, 16:39 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        shhhhhhhh
        
        big knickers? mars bars?
        
        zxcvbnm- @shadyadie | 28 Nov '08, 16:39 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        it's still a mystery to me
        
        colon_closed_bracket @ThingsThatFly | 25 Feb '10, 10:43 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - pffft, go on, put up the website on here.
      
      youre hardly breaking any laws, and these people seem like the worst kind of pond life.
      
      Alex_b | 28 Nov '08, 16:32 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - what is all this?
      
      i've hardly be around this week, what have i missed?
      
      brusma | 28 Nov '08, 16:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - ONLY THE BEST THING EVER TO HAPPEN!
        
        sadpunk @brusma | 28 Nov '08, 16:35 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        and it is...?
        
        brusma @sadpunk | 28 Nov '08, 16:36 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        jobless fella
        
        big pants
        bites finger
        sugar addiction
        ten mars bars a day!!!
        
        tiramisu @brusma | 28 Nov '08, 16:39 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        ...
        
        On the first or second page'll be a 400-plus post thread re MarcoFella being in the metro. Best thing to do is read it...
        
        theguywithnousername @brusma | 28 Nov '08, 16:40 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        WTF!
        
        brusma @theguywithnousername | 28 Nov '08, 16:44 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Just send them this photo
      
      and a severed finger
      http://viewmorepics.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=viewImage&friendID=10653666&albumID=0&imageID=4002532
      
      Alex_b | 28 Nov '08, 17:11 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I like the way you censored 'My name is [xxxxx]'
      
      Then left 'Kind regards James' at the bottom.
      
      :D
      
      tommyroxx | 28 Nov '08, 17:34 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Cheeky sod friend requested me too.
      
      Does this mean he can now view my profile? I stupidly hit 'ignore' on my mobile which didn't give me the option to block.
      
      MirriLondon | 28 Nov '08, 19:32 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - uh oh
        
        you may as well have just handed him the rope
        
        too_black_too_strong @MirriLondon | 20 Feb '09, 20:16 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - ?????!!!!!!!!?????!"!?"?"?££$("(¬!!!??????!!?!?!!?1212
      
      Parsefone | 28 Nov '08, 19:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - i cant believe how great this whole thing is
      
      best WTF ever
      
      fuck_this_band | 28 Nov '08, 19:44 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Did Jules ever see this?
      
      TheDailyBumbler | 20 Feb '09, 20:15 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - I saw it the other day
        
        wouldn't mind a bit of extra cash Lol
        
        julesfella @TheDailyBumbler | 20 Feb '09, 21:30 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - :D
      
      guntrip | 30 Apr '09, 23:52 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - nice bump
        
        haribo7989 @guntrip | 30 Apr '09, 23:53 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Jesus Absolute Christ. My life has just peaked.
      
      (from the Daily Mail comments)
      
      ""Sweat" excuse though. Does he think the Magistrate lives on "mars". Your just a common coward mate, you deserve to be thrown to the "lion" bars and a "whip" thrown infor good measure. Deport him to another "galaxy" perhaps.
      
      - Alan, Newcastle, 27/11/2008 13:52"
      
      wrightylew | 1 May '09, 00:01 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - hahahahahahahahahahaha
        
        hahahahaha
        
        too_black_too_strong @wrightylew | 1 May '09, 00:02 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - what fucking scenes!
        
        drakepress @wrightylew | 1 May '09, 00:04 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - I wish you could post emoticons on DiS,
        
        because I would post three thousand spinning head grins.
        
        poptimusgrime @wrightylew | 1 May '09, 00:08 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - It's fucking superb
        
        unfamiliar @wrightylew | 1 May '09, 08:55 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - "Mr Fella"
      
      :'D
      
      too_black_too_strong | 1 May '09, 00:08 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - D'you reckon when he's out, and some stranger says to him "Oi, fella"
        
        he goes "How did you know my name!?"
        
        poptimusgrime @too_black_too_strong | 1 May '09, 00:09 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        yeah
        
        then pretends their fingers are made of chocolate and tries eating them
        
        wrightylew @poptimusgrime | 1 May '09, 00:10 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I still dont know EXACLTY whats going on here
      
      Cavirar&cigarettes informed me of it last week over a beer but im confused, when why how what? and is it LOLsome
      
      Yesiamaduck | 1 May '09, 00:41 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - can i just remind everyone of the following:
      
      http://www.facebook.com/pages/Marco-Fella/42488201058?ref=ts
      
      whiterussian | 1 May '09, 02:23 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - this must have kicked off during my most recent DiS hiatus
      
      1. LOL
      2. His name is actually Marco Fella?
      
      colon_closed_bracket | 1 May '09, 09:14 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - jobless fella
        
        lol
        
        colon_closed_bracket @colon_closed_bracket | 6 Sep '10, 16:57 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - started laughing again at the phrase "Jobless Fella" sorry.
      
      JOBLESS FELLA
      JOBLESS FELLA
      JOBLESS FELLA
      JOBLESS FELLA
      JOBLESS FELLA
      JOBLESS FELLA
      
      shucks | 25 Feb '10, 10:56 | X | ^ This | Reply
      
      brusma and heartworms this'd this
    - can't believe i never commented on this
      
      Jordan_229_2 | 6 Sep '10, 17:19 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - bf
      
      echo
      
      team_cooper | 22 Oct '12, 14:17 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - Truly magnificent.
      
      justanothersheeldz | 22 Oct '12, 14:27 | X | ^ This | Reply
    - I met him once
      
      marilyninthesky | 8 Apr '13, 16:27 | X | ^ This | Reply
      - What was he like?
        
        Elaina_Casoolare @marilyninthesky | 8 Apr '13, 16:37 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Really hairy
        
        marilyninthesky @Elaina_Casoolare | 8 Apr '13, 16:38 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        Was he eating a Mars Bar?
        
        Yesiamaduck @marilyninthesky | 8 Apr '13, 22:30 | X | ^ This | Reply
        
        oojimaflop this'd this

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