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and don't ever open or finish the milk
so yeah, there are rules, my own!
no need to take it so seriously
I think I'm just going to kill myself, will that make you happy?
I fail at everything in life.
I'm not actually sad, it's ok. :)
I mean rules, ACTUAL rules
maybe I mean moral rules
I mean, rules that actually work and are always true
so can I make up my own based on my experience then, is that the best I'm ever gonna be able to do?
They're rules in life...
these might be rules
Even if you are in a relationship and are very comfortable with each other!
I could never do a Pony with someone watching!
the more tine, energy, effort, love and consideration they will expect from you in the fututre.
they're a man-made concept designed to keep order
which always confuses me - so they'll arrest you if you fail and do nothing when you've died, because they can't?
it always always turn out bad?
But then you'll get drunk and forget about it, and you'll traipse log juice all over the axminster.
He'd spent the weekend vanning stuff from his old place to this new sunny clean flat on the Camberwell New Road.
Anyways, they'd managed to unpack some of the stuff on Sunday afternoon and even made it pretty cosy, put out some candles, sorted the TV so it worked and ordered in a chinese.
The heating didn't work properly but this was being fixed the next day - it was fine they'd just get under blankets and share a nice big bottle of Shiraz as they settled down for their first evening in in their new ace pad.
Everyone had googled the best way to get to their works and were actually a little excited by the first commute (as I'll bet everyone is, if secretly when they move house - I know I was)
So at some point after midnight, teeth were brushed, lights switched off and the new flatmates all went to bed. It had been a lovely evening after a weekend of hard but comradely lugging.
Next day matey wakes up, stretches and gets out of bed full of beans...the shower worked (great pressure) and the other flatmates were up, ready to share xroissants and coffee. Someone had even bought the papers and some orange juice which was promptly slurped down. My friend was the last to leave for work that day.
a glance at the clock signalled that it was 8:45 and time to make tracks...he was unsure about traffic and didnt want to be late so he did the washing up, being careful to clean after the crummy plates (it was a lovely kitchen).
He pulled on his coat, double-checked his ipod, book, keys and wallet and made for the front door.
Twisted the handle, opened the door to a crisp winters day - one of the ones where it takes your eyes a few minutes to adjust.
The birds were in the trees, the streets were a' bustlin
and a tramp was pulling his bumcheeks apart bent over about 15 centimetres from my friend in the middle of pushing out a sweetcorn and Special Brew murky meatloaf of a giant shit right on my friend's pristeen doorstep
it was literally half in, half out and my friend testifies to half being a good 4 inches with the diameter of a Finsbury Park Yam.
always wear a belt
whilst having your house keys in your mouth when taking a piss.
you cannot fly or u will die.
you're Roger Whittaker.
Leave it to the pros.
I was looking for, a rule that covers evrything and is true
* Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth
* Don’t worry about the future; or worry, but know that worrying is as
effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing
* Do one thing everyday that scares you
* Don’t be reckless with other people’s hearts, don’t put up with
people who are reckless with yours
* Keep your old love letters, throw away your old bank statements
* Dance…even if you have nowhere to do it but in your own living room.
I just need the rule in my head
be really fricking careful.
wear a slogan T-Shirt.
CD Cover. Haircut tomorrow while you're here sir?
You keeping tabs on me?
As previously stated while I had your attention I thought I'd ask. As you have probably now deduced I'll be having the silver locks trimmed and thought if you were going I'll say hello this time.
Well, if I do potter on down I shall look out for you. I shall also ensure I'm not reading the Daily Mail this time.
It'll be the morning though as I have a duaghter / wife free period to do my mans stuff.
had that very same T-shirt.
We never spoke but he was my hero when I was a nipper.
Trust me it's the new rock n roll.
do it in the right place. Sheeeesh.
and act daft within.
but I virtually always believe what people tell me. I don't like liars and so therefore I assume people never lie, which is a bit silly but it's nice in a certain way. Maybe I'm just gullible.
you've caught me bang to rights.................................................................................I am 47 and 11/12ths
before you start drinking