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MIND_MELTINGLY SERIOUS THREAD OF ASTONISHING SERIOSITY
Have you ever tried to silently pass wind so as to deter a workmate from bugging you? It's a risk, granted, but I have the ability (perhaps we all do) to sense when a trump is going to cause a rumply ruckus around my anal lips, and when it will pass through silently, like a ghost, and just now I managed to judge perfectly and emit a quite superb stench that was barely louder than the flap of a butterfly's wings, and the admin lady who was bugging me to do some actual work became suddenly distracted and left me to my own devices. Have you ever made use of an absolutely foul physical function to similar success?