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i've spent the day reading 'brief history of time' and now i'm listening to Dvorak.
i'm such a comedy old man :(
that doesn't help either.
but reading a book about stuff i dont understand, then listening to classical music i don't really understand either... oh dear, wheres my cardigan? wheres my slippers?! oh, they're already on me. FUCK.
i dont see how it would effect yr chances of getting a gf, unless you brought it up in conversation?
'what did you do today?'
'i read a book about stuff i don't get, and listened to that theme from that hovis ad, you know the one, boy on a bike, big fuck off hill...'
who is like his online personal, that I have ever met. As a result your a narsasistic, spiteful and brutally honest person who confuses his own opinion with fact.
i will get u laid
i'm not fucking you.
i am, who i am. no matter where i am.
its really an online persona, unless the online me, has over taken the real me? oh god. its a vicious circle of 'what ifs'
heh, i'm listening to the theme from that hovis ad. :)
and House is awesome. Albeit not real.
So, like, I hurt girls arms by mistake, and then they don´t want to go out with me for any length of time.
i reckon you won't be single for long. naaaahhhhh, you're too ace not to be snatched up.
oh life, how you torment me.
I srsly love you loads :D
and he was all "why don't you just go for it?" and i was all "because i exist in a binary elliptical orbit around Planet Mental and Planet Bastard" and he didn't reply. also i'm WELL ugly. and that's why i'm single! LOLZO
it wasn't totally out of the blue.
I would like a job writing sci-fi. My list of jobs I want now goes:
1. Writing sci-fi
2. Making sandwiches
although hopefully it will be for him oneday.
he's had stuff published on some online sites though.
Even so, if anyone here wants to either pay me or pass on details about how I can get paid or work towards (?) getting paid for writing sci-fi then, I´m all ears.
i wish it was still Ye Olde Days (ie the 1940s/50s) when there was a mass market of regular magazines of short fiction. must've been so easy to make a living back then. i know that's how vonnegut / philip k dick etc started out.
this planet bastard/
For example, I've been eying up (and have been eyed up) by a super fitty for AGES now, but have no idea how to go "Hey hot stuff, fancy going out for a drink and possible bumping uglies with yours truly?"
And everyone is urging me on to ask said super fitty out. But it's just, LEIK, REALLY DIFFICULT? Because, despite eye-fucking for ages, we've made very little contact with each other.
I'm going to listen to Lover I Don't Have Love really loud now.
just get closer to them and say Hi. Just see if you can get talking and offer to buy them a drink.
IT'S A TRAP
I think the world in general is skewed towards people who can just buy people drinks then ¨something can happen,¨ it all seems to involve a lot more maneuvering than that. Like arms around, and choice moments, and that.
where I was complimented on my Black Flag t-shirt and stuff and I was like "YES! I'M GETTIN' SOME TONIGHT!"
But no. Nothing...yet. :'(
I hate being so bloody shy about this shit. I need a friend to go "My mate fancies you. How about it?" like it's high school forever.
over a speedbump, it may rattle a lot and look dodgy and require a bit of effort, but it's pretty safe.
If you've got complimented...repay the compliment! And try and initiate some physical contact, that's a good indicator- touch their arm when you speak to them, if you sit down rest yr leg against theirs, that kind of stuff.
when I go for my weekly stare tomorrow.
yeah, so i popped to yr profile to oggle. fuck off :p
Maybe I should be more o'fearless...
if you want something. get it.
even if it means saving up yr pocket money for months.
start conversation, ask where he goes out, what music he likes, <insert compliment>, oh well i'm going to <insert event> at some point soon, would you like to come? yes? well here's my number, get in touch.
Finding out something you both like and then arranging to do something off the back off that is always a good route to take. It worked on my current gf!
but not, annoyingly drunk. just that drunk where you do care.
ask thesoundofbastards for tips.
i'm just not their type
Girls love that shit.
superficially i'm a wimpy ponce
Maybe i should start wearing pink muscle tanktops/shave some chinese letters into my hair
but if I was it'd probably be down to my short attention span and getting easily distracted.
if a brilliant girl comes along though that i want to stay with more than 3 months...yeah great. Until that day, it's the single life for me.
I post on message boards but I´m still apparently more than just vaguely palatable to the opposite sex- they´re like, falling over to get to me and such, so I can just wait around and see what happens with whoever. FUCK YOU AND YOUR WHOLE OPERATION, PIP_.
we don't all have to be nervous indie kids need the MTFU all the time. It's possible to like yourself, get the ladies AND post on internet messageboards!
to find out how, sign up to my course, starting at just $200 for the first year...
I would make the general pedantic dispute that MTFUing is distinct from learning to maneuver stuff consistently with minimal clumsiness but STILL. I´m up for learning how. Even if it involves some general correction of limb length.
I'm not in the business of penis extensions, sorry
I´m more about shortening, or at least tightening up somewhat, my arms.
"third leg" and all that.
heh. long day. sorry.
join the club!
oh, it'll be just like the masons, minus covering up aliens and shit.
I like to bathe in self-pity!!
with bubbles. and a glass of red.
fuck. i'm not only a comedy old man, i'm a 30something woman!
i say 'dinner?'
:s DiSisms scare me.
That never worked out.
The last time i saw her was in the reflection of a uni building in December.
Woe is me :[
I think I might fear it a bit, actually. Relationships sound really good in theory, but having to do all the couple-y relationship-y type stuff - like seeing each other and connecting and that - is kind of annoying to a scary amount.
just my constant misery.
Have you spoken to Will Smith about this?
OF DISERS WHO R LAME
we're used to it by now
*does air slam-dunk motion*
because i hate people in general. I'm a loner, an outlaw. you'd think girls would be into this, theyre not.
if you're really hot. Well, that's what films tell me anyway.
pretty much, and you need a leather jacket, i dont have a leather jacket.
otherwise people might think you've seen the Matrix too many times.
that someone who frequently posts on here has JUST realised why they are single.
i spent yesterday on the beach with a girl yesterday, we even went flat hunting. :p
it may have come across a little mean.
i like girls.
not really :p
i like girls, just... can't find any i like for reasons beyond 'they remind me of an ex' ergh!
make a list of things you like in girls.
day and asked me to make her a mix cd.
I went home and said to my wife:
me: so my ex im'd me, you're with me making her a mix tape, right?
I have the best wife in the world.
1 bad luck
3 not trying hard enough and/or lack of confidence
4 not being good enough
I hardly ever meet any men, when I do I hardly ever fancy them, when I fancy them they hardly ever fancy me, and when they do fancy me it usually means there's something wrong with them.
This is what I do with people - if they like me, in anyway, I usually assume it's because there's something wrong with them. Which goes a fair way towards explaining why I hate most of my friends.
what's wrong with you?
a. there aren't any at work who aren't too old and/or married
b. my friends nearly all have boyfriends or girlfriends and have stopped going out, or don't live nearby
c. I have no social skills :(
maybe try something new? Or form a band- its a good way to meet people, and 'guys' dig 'chicks' in bands.
I used to be in a band. We were awful and none of us knew what we were doing so we didn't do any gigs, we just used to practice in the living room.
I was trying to find somewhere different to work in the summer holiday in the hope of meeting new people and stuff, but my manager at my term-time job is trying to make me work there. :-/
its great for meeting people, and not too far away from you.
and in most cases, it turns out there really is something wrong with them and it's not just in my head.
cos you're freakishly tall innit
i'm actually freakishly tall myself. Possibly even more freakishly than yourself
come on, budge up
that doesn't look too good..
i just didn't want to accept it
i'm a hermaphrodite
best of both worlds?
you can go earn the money, whitey can do all the cooking and cleaning, and i can do the best bits of both genders. I.e. nothing
more Shona for me
"my heart just imploded into an endless burning death of a thousand deaths, the horrific pain of romantic torture. My soul is dead, forevermore"
something like :( probably
WINKY WINK WINK
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
i'll take it
so we'll have to ration it sparingly
anyways, i think i'm gonna hit the hay, i'm tired and all that jazz. You coming to bed soon? Don't be too noisy yo
How are you? Apart from single and bitter?
i'm fine. ya know. just 'sparking up discussion'
norway treating you well?
i start wrokign tomorrow thgouh and will be wroking full time all of july :(
you'll turn into me soon!
the whole Mastodon back-catalogue is on my ipod. win?
I just listened to Leviathan.
i found something called the 'lifesblood ep', should provide some extra rocking for tomorrow.
do you reckon the coach driver will let us put a tape on like on school trips?
i´m single at the moment becuase of a time delay between real life events and figuring out shit. i tend to acknowledge interest from someone months or even years after.
this is the most "emo" post you´ll get from me in a while. savour it sadists.
my girlfriend cheated on me and then went out with another boy. Now she wants to be friends and for us to be close like we used to be and tell each other stuff.
people do suck
and it was featured on DiS, shes not in the country anymore either so it has to wait til i go back to uni. that and she probably doesnt like me anyway.
because I can't be bothered to make the effort to chat up girls right now.
Nothing to do with my appearance. No siree.
my last relationship was full of TOO MANY ROWS and I DON'T WANT ANY.
She was nice, but in the end most of our text conversations ended in mutual character assassination.
potential metal band.
I wonder why.
And someday I wish I was...
you're from France right?
do you know Aix-en-Provence?
Nice town if I remember correctly.
Museum of paintings is quite famous.
i always meet people at the wrong time
right time, wrong people.
Any girl that likes me, my heart fails to swell.
Any girl I take a shine to, it never appears to be mutual.
That's my explanantion.
only with boys, obviously.
always a killer for me.
yes. we should. well, at least go for a drink or something/some serious thursday night drinking.
i'm single because i look like a seal (see profile pic) - getting used to lads not loving the snapping midget look.
That and what froglet said.
*I don't meet that many girls that are suitable.
*When I do find someone where there is a mutual attraction it's ALWAYS the wrong time, for example they're on/off with their boyfriend and haven't fully broken up with them yet.
*I'm can be quite shy and the girls I go for also tend to be quite shy, this leads to very awkward conversation which ends up going nowhere.
everyone fell in love with you within ten minutes?
The 1% that don't tend to be more my type, which is an annoying conicedence. ;)
you're so funny.
"I'm single because:
*I don't meet that many girls that are suitable."
^^that is really funny
: D : D : D : D : D : D : D : D : D : D : D : D