i used to work on the 3rd floor of an office opposite Manchester Coach Station - always a good place for drunk people,and scottish people, and quite oftenboth. Such types are very keen on fighting and i once saw this puny man with a can of stella in one hand and a pack of marlboro in the other try to beat up two massive security men, who laughed, then pushed him away, then punched him a couple of times, and when he still wouldnt go away one of them sat on him while the other phoned the police.
when they arrived he tried to beat them up too, so they threw him in the back of the van. they all laughed at the van rocking to and fro for a little while, then one of the security men showed one of the cops a bit of the man's blood on the floor, and the copper patted him on the back. Then the police got in the van and drove off. All true.