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Although i think i'm now banned from all buses on the Isle of Wight.
Regale me with your bus related anecdotes.
serenade his tramp-dog aboard the bus with 'the look of love' by ABC. I still laugh to this day.
The Andover Advertiser went with 'DRUNKEN PUNKS STEAL BUS' which was fair enough really.
One of those Ronson's Woodseal headlines.
The Ham and High is a never ending source of amusement, particularly "Ninja Mum Back On The Warpath".
A great one in Kew "Roundabout Angers Residents"
And my all time fave in the New Malden Gazette "Wheelchair rape: Man in court"
with the crazy woman who kept birds in her house? The whole place was covered in bird shit?
Well, that crazy woman used to catch the same bus as me every morning.
i thought she was so frustratingly stupid she deserved to die of bird poo poisoning.
and let her know in some way that I knew her house was covered in shit!
"Hey! Shittyhouse! Yeah turdwalls, I'm talking to you!"
it must have been about half past four in the morning, and I was staying at my parents' house which is normally a 20 minute bus ride out of town, but with the night bus it takes about 40 minutes.
anyway. i was drunk. i was seriously drunk. one might even go so far as to say i was heavily intoxicated and with a distinct lack of control over my own actions, and even thoughts.
i was drunkenly flirting with an irishman on the phone, and had been all the way from town, so hadn't realised i got on 34b and not 34a, which doesn't REALLY matter, it just means it takes a slightly different route the last five minutes before my stop. i was however used to getting the 34a and on this particular evening i was in no state for this kind of surprise.
as the bus turned right where i expected it to turn left, i told the person on the phone to wait for a minute while i raised my head up to get a good look out of the window and make sure that we were actually not going the way i thought we would be going. i then panicked, and ran up to the bus driver, demanding he stop the bus and let me off immediately. he refused to do so, and tried repeatedly to assure me that he would let me off at my stop, and we would get there, and that i should just go back to my seat.
i was getting louder. i can imagine the rest of the passangers on the bus, that is those who were not asleep or making out with one of the other passangers, were staring at me and probably laughing to themselves, or possibly just quietly shaking their heads.
but i was too far gone. i was too drunk to listen to anything anyone said to me. i started talking very loudly on the phone about how the bus driver didn't even know where he was going, and i continued to do this until he let me off at the next stop, which was 2 stops before mine.
i got off quickly and walked the extra 10 minutes back to my house because i hadn't been patient, but at this point i was still just outraged at the stupidity of this bus driver.
when i woke up the next morning i did not only have the worst hangover i have ever had in my entire life, i also had nasty flasbacks of my rude and obnoxiously outrageous behavoir on the night bus, and i spent all day wishing i could find the poor bus driver and apologise to him. i hate people who are twats on the bus, and now i had become one of them.
When I scrolled down and seen your name i lauighed even harder :D
IS THAT IT?
What you gonna do about it eh?
I thought it was going to be another scutter bucket epic tale. Good effort though.
Whiterussian is lady-in-waiting.
involving a halfway chav on speed... but i'm not going to. it's not bus related.
buses on the isle of wight are ridiculously expensive. I used to spend £5 going to work and back for a job where i would earn £12 a day. and that was about 5 years ago.
I lived about 4 miles away from the local train station, and trains were down (engineering or summit). Got to about 11 or so, got bus, at the end it was just me and the driver, we got talking about football (always a good tack, it's handy following Villa and Blues in birmingham), and he dropped me off at home instead of at the station. Saved me a few quid on taxi and a fair few minutes.
and gives me a lift up the road if i see him when im walking, he always says hello and is probably in the top 10 human beings ive encountered. i want to make him a badge or something
but I'm all about the positivity, so I'll just mention the time I was miles from anywhere and a night bus failed to stop when I stuck my arm out - leaving me with an epic wait in the cold for the next one. Another bus was a little way behind, and although it was out of service, it pulled up beside me and the doors opened. "Did he just go past without stopping?" the driver called to me. I nodded sadly. "Get in, then" he said cheerily, and pursued the first bus until it reached a busy stop where I could jump off and run to catch it. If the plexiglass screen hadn't been there I'd probably have kissed him goodnight.
I feel quite misty
he told you to shut up and i found that and the whole experience too much; i pretty much has an emotional breakdown - if fact, that might have been my first one...
it was my sister's fault
Some scabby bus driver accused me of being a waitress when i didn't have my bus pass. He wouldn't believe i was in school uniform until i got out some text books and told him about the origins of the Spartan political system. I thought my school uniform looked tolerable until his unkind comments. My sewing ego has been shattered and i have nothing else to wear that is clean and could be passed off as school uniform.
this is terrribly dissapointing :(
But too many people on here know too much.....
dirty dirty man