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I've just written this letter to KFC
Dear KFC chicken people,
Hello.
I frequently frequent you restaurant food buildings frequently and enjoy eating your chicken base products on a frequent basis. I even like your chips that other people have called horrible (I think they’re much better than McDonald’s!).
Anyway (moreover) I still have a gripe that I believe you need to respond to. This is that you don’t provide tap water when requested. That is, to be precise, water from the tap. I do not understand why this is. I have been told several times by your staff (I knew they worked there as they were behind the counter in your uniforms!!) that it is company policy not to give tap water to anyone. Even if, I presume they are a paying customer who is very thirsty indeed.
Not only, I think, this is very unfair as water is free (or at least not metered therefore any water usage is already a sunk cost to KFC!) but it may be indeed illegal. I can understand that you chicken people want to make lots of profit from customers buying fizzy drinks (beverages) but I think that not giving water reflects very badly on the company and I’m sure if the omnipresent Colonel was around, he’s disprove of this dubious tactic! (“NO!” He might bellow whilst adding secret spices to some KFC).
Therefore please can you inform (tell) me why you do this and what you intend to do to amend this measly policy? I do hope it changes as I’ve already told lots of people not to eat your delicious chicken until this matter is ironed out.
Many thanks for your time in reading this letter and advanced thanks for writing back*
Yours, Moker
P.S. Apologies for whom this letter is addressed to, I’m not insinuating that you are actually giant chicken people, working in offices. That would be silly!).
*Even further advanced thanks for amending this policy if you do so!!!!