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Must be able to cook, clean, sew, and play a musical instrument.
Please send photo of CD collection.
that plays obscure instruments, reads bukowski, rides a bicycle, has tattoos and good taste in knitwear.
i've only just realised who you are.
it's a dealbreaker
is trombone obscure enough?
i sometimes wear good knitwear and might get a tattoo and read bukowski at some point.
scared of bikes tho.
Must have pulse.
Single f, under 33, must enjoy the sun, must enjoy the sea
[Sought by single m:] Mrs.Destiny, send photo to address, is it you and me?
if HeartbrokenStar is in fact Torquil Campbell
Must be able to attend at least three gigs a week and like long lie-ins on a Saturday.
Must not have cancer. Tell your mates.
funniest thing I've read all day
17 year old person wanted
preferably with a MTFU homekit.
(that would be amazing progress), must like 24 Hour Party People and Ben&Jerry's. Preferably 20-25.
with a taste for woolly hats, TS Eliot and electro anti-folk. Cricket fandom a bonus. Must like Clearlake.
Must believe that you can NEVER have enough distortion pedals.
must be alive.
sounds like a pub to me.
Presumably you didn't want someone who can type coherently?
I've never hidden anyone's shoes...
But sadly I have an unfortunate habit of fancying insensitive and thoughtless people and ignoring any woman who's got my own best interests at heart...
as that I tend not to really want someone who puts their relationship at the centre of their life and defines themselves by it.
A lot of insensitive and thoughtless people are only insensitive and thoughtless just 'cos they've got other things going on in life rather than just a relationship so don't always think about the relationship first and foremost.
I'm fine with that and would much rather that than the kind of person who gets into a relationship and then doesn't really have anything else going on in their lives...
I mean you're not sitting around waiting for a relationship to happen.
It's not so much madly ambitious career people I'm talking about - it's more that there've been people in the past I could have got into relationships with but they've been the kind of person who sees being in a relationship as the be-all and end-all of their existence. Which obviously means that
a) if it didn't work out then by breaking up with them you'd effectively be fucking up the very thing that's at the centre of their being
b) they wouldn't really understand how someone would want time to themselves/nights out with friends etc. and would expect them to be involved with everything I did ever.
Which, without me wanting to sound like a stereotypical male or indeed a callous bastard, wouldn't really suit me as I like my own space.
I'm not really fussed at getting in relationships or dating anyone anyway. It'd be nice if I met the right person but I don't want to be in relationship just for the sake of not being on my own.
rapier wit against rapier wit!
rapier wit at dawn, he who dies last wins
This could backfire on you - I'm a pretty big guy...
When shall we have this duel? Do we need an umpire?
just to make sure none of us are cheating and the jokes are sufficiently funny...
but im not into rape, soz
to indulge my geekiness and be generally lovely. Must enjoy going to lots of gigs, sampling interesting beers at nice-looking bars and pubs, watercolour drawings, bug-eyedly enthusiastic conversations about music, and jokes about sci-fi type things and imaginary films. Glasses and living nearby pref.
must not irritate me.
on which part?
on point 1.
then you'll be drowning in clunge.
Yeah. For sex and stuff.
I just didn't want to name the band. :)
pps: that was a "fuck off" of exclaim, not aggression.
Preferably emotionally vacuous and unable to fall in love. Must not own dungarees nor chew tobacco. Applications in my box!
ideally with unusual hairdo and irrational hatred of Patrick Kielty, to attend ridiculous amounts of gigs, drink loads of foreign beer and wine and set the rest of the world to rights.
Pulse preferable but not essential if I'm being totally honest.
I'm posting from the Old Bailey right now
the stab wounds were a bit of a giveaway
he was the one who inflicted them
"Honest guv, I only meant to rape an unconscious girl. I didn't think I was fucking a corpse. That'd be wrong."
must be nice, have okay music taste or better, must be interested in relevant and irrelevant stuff, and not be a munter
stop picking on me!
Female desired, 18-30, into dance, psych and noise, hallucinogens, amphetamines and spooning, adventure, hi-jacks and hi-jinks? Intelligent? Dark hair? Scruffy? PO BOX 25486
Wizard on a guitar and in the bedroom. Likes boobs and necks. Looking for ladytimes. I'm gonna make sex happen to you!
know what i mean?
if only just to prove that they do exist.
"Women, eh?" "Yeah. Tits."
must be shorter than me, slightly unhinged, and enjoy dogging
boy 21-25, must have something to say, play instruments (no drummers need apply)
Must be able to accept the occasion moodswing and appreciate flowers in old amaretto bottles. Dancing, drinking, stumbling home preferred x
was down weekend just gone, missed your chance..
sucks to be me :(
but only if I stop messing with my hair and only if i can sign some kind of contract within the next 3 weeks.
Shall I enclose a SAE with my CV?
and i live in the correct county. Yay me.
Whats the game again?
'accidental' gaybar use FTW
it's all about leicestershire!
The LE postcode prefix?
i meet all of your stated criterion.
my profile indicates that I am a Red or 'Lesser' Panda.
what more do you need?
i don't really fancy like sound of inferior pandas, regular ones are pretty good..plus red ones look nothing like proper pandas..i dunno, you're on the edge really. i do hope you're not from hinckley.
Can snow_brigade turn this around or is the end of the road?
is at the end of my road.
but my hairdresser is, does that count against me?
I say I'm not, but I'm now living on a farm thats dangerously close. a Desford/Kirky Mallory/Barwell no mans land, but raised on the tough streets of Broughton Astley.
Excuse my excitement, its not often theres a chance that someone even might begin to relate to my geography!
not being from hinckley is a good start, you've got that over me! although i am from the apparently posher Burbage, so i get to feel special!
MY hairdresser is from Burbage, and i live in leicester now so i think we know who's winning :D
I've lived and worked in Nottingham for 4 years. Is that better? I believe I claimed it wasn't the other day. Rural South Leicestershire FTW!
Does this mean we've both taken a Hinckley driving test? I'd feel we had some kind of bond then.
i don't drive, but i know loads of people who had to take the test a few times cos of the stupid road layout and such.
so no, no bond so far! sorry, you'll have to find some other tenuous link!
I so wanted this to work out.
when do you want your records back?
this is my favourite 'return after a few hours to laugh at responses' thread ever.
22, curly-haired, plays guitar (badly), voice (badly), trumpet (badly)
fuck it, let's make this a dating site
i'm dead special, like
im basically everyone's fantasy ever
Well I am, but i'm not.
face must not be wider than it is long
unless you are sophie ellis bextor
his face is wider than it is long
Must have a bit of meat on her bones and crave the sex.