My friends and I are now pretty barred. :'(
We were pretty drunk. We went outside for a smoke, and me and friend ran around this wall to have a quick wee. These bouncers came running round and were like 'If you're gonna have a piss there, you're not coming back in lads.'
We put ourselves away and went to go back in and this bouncer walks up to me and is like :@ 'WHAT DID I FUCKING TELL YOU?'. 'Not to pee on the wall. Which is why I stopped doing it.' 'Do I give a fuck? Fuck off you clown.'
So I got 'snarky', and started laughing, like 'Gladly, sir. May I fetch my coat?' 'NO.' So my mate went in and got our coats. We devised a plan. He had a huge flasher jacket on so he brought about 5 bottles out, hidden in his jacket.
But instead of walking off with them, we got them out in front of the bouncers and were like 'AHHHHHHH. YEAH! Love this. I'm having a top night. Let's take our money elsewhere.' So they fucking chased after us! HAHAH. They said 'GIVE ME THEM FUCKING BOTTLES UNLESS YOU WANT THEM WRAPPED ROUND YOUR FUCKING FACES.' Then they poured them on my mate who brought the beer out - all down his coat.
I wish I was the Terminator. I'd have crunched them through walls on to hot hobs and stood on their shades.
Do you think they'll remember me if I go again in like a month?