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i'm really bored
i want alice in wonderland syndrome omg
i had a touch of something like that...but it was the day after a heavy nitrous/weed/salvia session, so I guess it doesn't count
i am always trying to eat flowers, leaves, grass, bark off trees..so i guess i sorta DO have it. but it's not insano. i don't do it compulsively.
the boredom of
the sober week
the weekend is here
hip hip hooray
my friend bailed on me tonight cause she has cramps. she wanted to go drink tea. but i want to go out cause i just bought a new dress and my hair looks really nice today. hrm.
in line with previous posts here:
A man who just died is delivered to a local mortuary wearing an
expensive, expertly tailored black suit.
The female blonde mortician asks the deceased's wife how she would like
the body dressed. She points out that the man does look good in the
black suit he is already wearing.
The widow, however, says that she always thought her husband looked his
best in blue, and that she wants him in a blue suit. She gives the
Blonde mortician a blank check and says, 'I don't care what it costs,
but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.'
The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight, she finds
her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe;
the suit fits him perfectly.
She says to the mortician, 'Whatever this cost, I'm very satisfied. You
did an excellent job and I'm very grateful. How much did you spend?' To
her astonishment, the blonde mortician presents her with the blank
'There's no charge,' she says.
'No, really, I must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue
suit!' she says.
'Honestly, ma'am,' the blonde says, 'it cost nothing. You see, a
deceased gentleman of about your husband's size was brought in shortly
after you left yesterday, and he was wearing an attractive blue suit. I
asked his wife if she minded him going to his grave wearing a black suit
instead, and she said it made no difference as long as he looked nice.'
'So I just switched the heads.'
i'm gonna tell that to my friends, in my inimitable way.
"so I switched his head"