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whats the worst thing thats happened to you?
my friend told me yesterday she walked in on her mum and dad having sex doggy style, when she was 18.
i cant think of anything thats worse than this. having divorced parents can have its benefits.
please reply to this
It's too traumatic.
touched a nerver?
No, I just mean it's too traumatic to post in your threads
v5
once i grazed my knee.
some one i knew
walked in to see her mum wanking her step-dad off.
feeling sick at work
is the worst thing that is happening to me right now. i hate hangovers!!
not enough trauma
i once woke up next to a really hideous person
and haven't stopped crying since.
um
i remember your bed
is there a more dignified term for 'doggy style'?
anyone?
i tried to think of one
but failed.
*ill concealed giggle fit in the office*
aren't you your own boss?
I read that
just as I was having a drink and did thet laugh/choking thing. Made a really funny noise and evryone in the office looked and ask me if I was ok. Thats theworstthing thats happened to me. today.
A Cheeky Girl touch me in bad places
:(
* touched
did she touch your bum?
that is life.
She did indeed!
And I was "papped" for first time in my life.
I walked into my mates barthroom
saw his dad bashing one out
I win
I got
knocked over by a drunk driver when I was 6.My dad knew who it was but never went to the police.Something ive never forgave him for.
maybe it was a friend
probably my mum dying
most bad things i wouldnt undo cos good things generally come of them.
that said, my mum dying had a massive impact on who i've turned out to be, and im pretty happy with that person, really.
wrong user name
A friend of mine caught his dad jerking off to the Princess Diana interview.
(After her death, in the front room).
was she american?
Princess Diana?
Don't think so
haha
i ordered a veggie curry once
it was made entirely of courgette. the second worst of all the vegetables.
first worst
nah
aubergine is the devil in vegetable format.
actually
you are right. I'm glad we share the joint top two worst vegetables
go us
you're in the exclusive club that now involves us, and anna from the office down the corridor (before we moved offices).
when's the next meet up?
you can meet us lunchtime tomorrow if you want
just don't order the veggie curry.
Marrow
has to be up there.
no
it is nice roasted in slices.
the worst is clearly avocado.
not nice tasting, horrendous texture and looks minging
well its the WORST ONE
and why fucking pret think that sticking it with crayfish is a good idea i'll never know. poor little crays.
Travelling to see my then girlfriend on her gap year
I had a poor second year at uni scrimping to go and see her. I had to fly Ethiopian Airways. The Flight went London-Rome-Addis Ababa-Kilamanjaro-Dar Es Salaam then catch another flight to Zanzibar, but my flight got redirected back to Kilamanjaro and when I finally got to DES I'd missed my flight and the last one that night.
I had to rearrange my flight for 6am, and got conned by this tourist agent into going to his mate's hotel - IT WAS LITERALLY IN THE JUNGLE. And I got out, and was stood by a ditch, and they told me to walk forward to the place and I actally thought they were going to shoot me.
I then had to stay the night in a room straight out of Sauchsenhausen, wrapped myself in a mosquito net terrified. Then realised I'd paid for my return cab to the airport up front so they weren't coming back. Prepared myself to trek through the jungle and back down the motorway to the airport. Thankfully they did turn up. I caught the flight, and finally arrived in Zanzibar.
She then split up with me.
Probably because you were late
I can't stand tardiness
It's awesome!
Fly don't get the ferry. It costs like $20 more, but you get to fly in an Indiana Jones style plane with propellors and it takes 15 minutes - by the plan is half way up it starts going back down in to land.
And then you get to land on a strip surrounded by palm trees.
Ahhh, I wish I was back in Zanziber - in spite of everything I loved it, its the most beautiful place on earth
So much!
The gardens - they're by the fort. By day nothing special, but by night its the place to be. Loads of people selling food, barbeques selling fresh fish - like every type of fish imaginable and dead cheap. Also Zanzibar pizza - its like a pancake but wrapped around meat and veg into a parcel. You can also get them with choclate and bananas!
The old part of the town is incredible- a UN heritage site. It's literally as it has been for centuries - some of the carvings on the doors are incredible. You will get lost though!
If you've got time for an excursion pick between the spice tour (wars have been fought over Zanzibar it produces so many spices and the many all goes to the locals who produce them) where you really get to see a bit of what living on the island is like or Joanzi forest, the only place in the world you can see red colobus monkeys - they're amazing!
Also by the seafront there's an increbile Swahili restaurant whose lunch time buffet meal is delish, and just opposie it is this really old antiques shop - there's some finds in there (such as the gramaphone my ex bought and made me take home for her)
I recommend the Florida Guest house as a place to stay - breakfast of omlette, passion fruit juice, and a mandazi (a crescent shaped cinnamon hollow doughnut thing) - amazing!
I'm dead jealous!
Probably
but then I wouldn't have gotten to see a bit of Africa, with someone who I'm still amazing friends with
fucking hell
i was going to put something about being dumped whilst at the other end of the country and my return ticket being for two days in the future, but yours is waaaaaaaaaay more hardcore...
I don't do things by halves
Probably
pooing myself playing football when I was about eight.
amazing
I thank you
the worst day of my life
when my train was delayed by hours and i was in shit with my uni department as i missed a seminar, when i left my wallet on said train, had to go to swansea to retrieve it and got back to uni to find that my laptop had basically blown up.
all in about 10 hours.
why do i find these stories
funny?
because the worst thing to happen to you
was a rave?
yes.
spot on.
i meant i could sympathise with most of them
but i think if the ones where everything just goes tits up happened to me id have to just laugh
oh yeah
yeah i laughed the whole night after that unfortunate story, got very drunk and just thought "well, surely it can only get better"
dangerous thinking, but it seemed true.
yeah
id get very pissed off
then calm down i reckon and do the same.
my grandpa and then my nan dying. :(
once when i was five
i offered my mum one of my crisps but when she went to reach for one the bag was empty.. i thought it would be funny but ive felt guilty every day for the last 18 years
damn! found
my sources :p
mine spanned 2 days that were
3 weeks apart, but now blur into 1 in my head.
Day 1: a 10 hour delay at Madrid airport due to airline maintenance. Iberia initially offered us a hotel room for the night, but when they found out that Brendan was South African (and therefore needs a visa to enter Spain) they made us stay in the airport! After some persuading they let us have a shower in the business class lounge (oh how the other half live). Afterwards we were kicked back out with the other peasants and had an awful night trying to sleep on the cold floor (after being denied blankets).
Day 2: We arrived in Madrid after a 9 hour flight from Jo'burg for our connecting flight to Heathrow. Brendan was told that he had to go a different way to me because of the different passports. I had to go on a train to a different terminal and we could meet at the gate later on. I had to travel for about 20 mins to get to the gate. It was about 8am and boarding wasn't for another hour so I brushed my teeth, freshened up and sat down to wait.
10 minutes before boarding there was a massive explosion that I heard over my very loud music I was listening to on head phones. The whole building shook! I looked out the window and there was a huge cloud of black smoke. The airline staff were all running about screaming, all the passengers just stood there. I was so freaked out, I had no idea whether Brendan was ok, or even where he was. I had no money (Brendan had it all in his bag) and no mobile (I didn't bother take mine, we used his all holiday). We weren't evacuated for a further 20 mins (I found out later the airport had been warned about the bomb an hour before it went off). No-one would tell us what happened. I stood in the cold on the airport concourse with a British family and some Americans and a Canadian. After about 2 hours one of them found out what had happened from his WAP phone, it was a car bomb in the airport car park next to our building, the report said no-one was injured, at least I knew Brendan was ok now. I borrowed someone's mobile to let my parents know I was ok only to find out it hadn't been on the news, as Saddam's hanging was the only thing showing. I told my Mum to call Brendan and let him know I was ok. Apparently he hadn't even know that there was a bomb, they were just told there were delays due to 'trouble'!
People were slowly filtering back up the gangways and into the airport until a whistle was blown and people started running back outside. Everyone was told to get back. Little bit scary, but nothing happened.
Finally we were let back in the airport, after standing for 3 hours on the runway! The flight hadn't been cancelled and was due to leave in just over an hour. When I got to the gate I still hadn't been in contact with Brendan and he was nowhere to be seen. I waited until boarding and then explained to the staff that I couldn't get on the plane without him, to which I was told "well we're not waiting", nice. After a lot of gesturing and trying to explain the situation they checked the computer and told me he had already boarded, so I got on the plane. He wasn't there! I waited a while and was just about to demand they let me off when he came in the back door of the plane. Phew. I can honestly say that dropping down beneath the clouds I've never been so happy to see gloomy, rainy London in my life!
I'm not reading that
you've probably heard it before
I like to moan.
Oh, and it's about YOU.
: |
That's
a roundabout way of telling us about Saddam's hanging. It was a black day wasn't it?
"what a waste"
crikey. :(
Listening to my crying mother
on the phone early on a fairly recent sunday morning telling me that my Nana had just died.
Having to break up with a girl I am still very much in love with.
:(
That's much
sadder than Saddam's hanging. Poor you
:(
dude, I'm so sorry to hear that. *hug*
Cheers dude
people people people
some people are taking this thread too seriously
stop posting
Going down one of those slides
that's really long and and some girl coming down behind me too fast, knocking me forward and propelling me at such an angle that my genitals landed squarely on the corner of the steel 'exit ramp' at the end of the slide.
I didn't get
a blowjob on my birthday
I'm sorry to hear that!
:(
I thought it was tradition
What has happened to our traditions?
I blame... oh let's say chuff!
No
I'm not blaming him. He would have given me a blowjob on my birthday
He wouldn't mean it though
I'm not looking
for meaning
I know what you're looking for
http://www.drownedinsound.com/articles/2181085#r2181168
That's a disgrace!
Should I write to my MP?
Without a doubt
My MP?
Not at all
http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/mpdb/img/31801.jpg
I <3 Clappison
Has he got good technique?
hands or no hands?
No hands
he's a shit load better than Claire Ward.
He looks like
he might
Member of Penis?
My new job.
Maybe a bit of an exaggeration...
Really though, it's probably a family thing that I couldn't really post on here.
turning on a tap in a pub
and instead of water, a cockroach came out on my hand.
Oh my god
That reminds me of the time I sucked up an earwig through a straw, whilst drinking chocolate nesquik.
I sucked an earwig through a kazoo
that was in my sylvania families cottage.
Horrible
isn't it. I thought it was a bit of chocolate that hadn't mixed in properly
You don't get kazoos with Sylvanian families
I know I donated it to the
beaver family. It was in their attic bedroom . . . . how do YOU know?
I used to collect them
we've found our common ground
That made me do a snigger.
Sorry.
I think I probably would have set fire to my hand after that. I HATTTEEE cockroaches.
I just squealed, loudly
it was the Jug of Ale in Birmingham, one of my favourite pubs. Their taps have been fine since, but I'm never drinking out of them!
my fiance did this too...
it get brought up at EVERY drinking circle now.
Actually
I remember hearing my mum and dad having noisy sex once aged about 13. I found it pretty traumatising. Something about it just isn't right - the societally enforced separation of sex and family makes the idea of any immediate family members fucking really quite bizarre, distasteful and disturbing.
Objectively - is this a cultural problem? Parents fucking is pretty normal really, so for it to be disturbing to kids or family members, something must be wrong in the traditional family dynamic, no? I mean, I've heard friends of flatmates doing it and just ignored it or found it mildly amusing, so it's not just overhearing sex in general.