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You know what to do.
for that !
Make stuff up whilst ignoring whatever anyone else is up to.
I'm going to spend my entire weekend irritating a whelk
Now I'm stuck in an eternal vortex, my theory having been rendered useless.
So I guess this weekend for me will now be vortex-based
Free (irrotational) or Forced (rotational)?
one would be the comfiest?
It'd be like being the water going down a plug-hole.
I expect i shall eat, watch TV, sit in the sun and not spend any money...much like yesterday, today and the day before that
except for the bit where there's a person living inside you. I wouldn't like that
Just that he woudn't like it...
The 2007 Dental Awards. Me, in a Tuxedo and shizzle. Smoking cigars. Drinking free wine. Eating free food. Trying to steal people's receipts to put them through expenses myself to get more money. Getting drunk. Talking to 'celebrity guest host' Paul Ross. Dancing to the shitty covers band that we've booked. Playing on the casino. Tables full of hot young hygienists.
than go there...
how often do you get the chance to vomit on paul ross?
It's a free night out full of fun and drink. Only a FOOL would turn that down.
that I'm a fool...
I manage to rack up 18 posts an hour inbetween fillings and root canal treatments.
You're leik, amazing. You'll win fo' sure
ask him why he's so much shitter than Jonathan. Go on.
The only good thing about JRoss: his wife.
Grade A Mams.
(not about her breasts). Jonathan is a foppish genius, and Paul is creepy and talks about soaps on This Morning.
Or a lispy, loud, egotstical cunt? Yeah...
and films! And David Bowie!
I love Jonathan Ross.
I really couldn't care less about two of them.
does all the Carphone Warehouse corporate shit.
I thought you'd need a conversation piece... and what better to start with?
I will try that. Any gossip about him?
he is fucking Charles Dunstone
there are no celebrity dentists?
except the one on Ten Years Younger i suppose, but, you know, dentists need a Dr Chris type representative don't they?
do you not get to take a date?
surely an event of this amazingness is a plus one shindig?
*pick me pick me pick me*
and head down about 10ish, you'll be able to wander in with no drama. Then we can rob the rest of the free wine that stupid other tables have left behind. Hurrah!
I'll see you there. what colour is your tie? we don't want to clash afterall.
I leave all the extravagant nonsense to the old boys trying to impress everyone. I rely on my sparkling wit and smiling face to impress people.
Hang on. Erm. Probably white with red polka dots?
especially as I have a red with white polka dots extravaganza of a dress type thing
COULD WE BE ANY MORE CO-ORDINATED?!
Now, get some glasses and a pack of cigarettes and you can escort me. Winner.
You won't need a guitar when we're dancing LARGE on the floor.
I shall ask around and see who's up to the task tonight, and then email ThisMorning and get them to book one.
Although would people really want to watch a feature on tooth treatments?
tonight - something! Involving drinking! And Homesick Alien! And anyone else who wants to come! Somewhere! Probably!
Saturday - supermarket, entertaining HungoverBamos
Sunday - Smog tribute thingy at Bloomsbury Bowling Lanes. Hurrah!
I'm out somewhere apparently for someone's birthday, but it is likely to be a very dull evening.
Tomorrow I'm off to Peterborough for the Posh v Hereford and a few drinkies taking in some Premiership games on tele
Sunday The missus is away so Bushey is my oyster. Probably buy every sunday broadsheet and ensconse myself in the local.
Monday Off work, to be decided
Tomorrow - Something....
Sunday - More of the same.
All I want really is the guy from Gumtree to email me back so we can go and look at some of the flats he has up for rent in Middlesbrough.
Tonight : wife is going out so DiS, Beers and Bones.
Tomorrow night : Elk City + Klima
Sunday : my kid's birthday. Maybe Po'Girl gig at night.
tomorrow - oirish people! drinking! afterskool! ha!
sunday - sleeping, and CSS!
tonight - HIGNFY, QI, Peep Show, Fajitas
tomorrow - Peterborough vs Hereford and ridiculous drunkenness
sunday - my parents are coming, pub lunch, walk
and Napoleon IIIrd?
of smalltown america work. yeah!
I have enough to do something, but I might just consolidate and prepare for next week (pay day)
The earlies!! I completely forgot!
Saturday: Arsenal vs Spurs, then 'a fistful of folk' with Brooner
coming to Peterborough lad
see above, I have a date with a certain scotsman.
don't get jealous, it doesn't suit you.
me on then?
about the earlies. Stop this nonsense, we are going out next saturday. Is that not good enough?
sorry I forgot I have agreed to see the Pet Shop Boys with crablin
I'm not going to your birthday, I forgot I had already arranged to see Tina Arena with Joeymahone.
saturday - hang out with Bastard_cat in a vortex for a few pints, then off to see Do the Bartman Turner and Hooch Overdrive and Pull my teeth out I’m called John at the Goat and Two Trumpets pub.
sunday - I could care less.
You coming to the gig after? Should be a good one, Helicopter Wow Wow Sheep are special guests apparently and are doing a rare dub/grind metal set with spoons.
Tomorrow - The Rakes
Sunday - Sleep and look forward to ATP
finish packing for our move to chichester on wednesday, try to relax a bit before the hugeness of moving+atp next week :D
Tomorrow - Park for REAL cricket
Sunday - See today
its fucking ace.
Playing tomorrow night
Playing again late late tomorrow night.
Canasta? The cello? Duncan in your local theatre adaptation of Macbeth? Cribbage?
Its a film....sounds like??
which now includes accompanying Bamos to the Denist Awards. get in.
I've mispacked again. who knew that this weekend I *would* need two jumpers? stupid weather
Tonight: HIGNFY and Peep Show
Tomorrow night: I think I have to go to the club night at the Underworld in Camden. Ugh.
Sunday: Watching lots of South Park
All I want to do is laze around at home and play Gears of War but I have to go to London :(
saturday nights at the underworld is club silver, which is SO SO BAD. it's like the most obvious NME indie (jet, strokes, kaisers) mixed with the most obvious Kerrang! alt (foo fighters, blink 182).
horrendous. good luck :(
I think that's the reason it's been chosen as a destination!
alcohol cures all, as ever.
when I get back tonight and I'm staying there till Sunday, when I might do some washing of clothes and myself.
Saturday - Friend's having a picnic, if weather is decent. Probably soemthing in the evening, again I don't know what.
Sunday - Cinema, and then CSS!
Sat: HOWLETTS WILD ANIMAL PARK - they gots animals and stuffs
Sun: Recovering from the animal park
a new ep over the weekend under a ukulele shop yeaaaah!
Mead festival on lindisfarne!
Tomorrow morning: The quickening
Tomorrow Afternoon: Duck frisbee (semis)
Tomorrow Evening: Cattle grid judging at the old beehive.
Monday: contemplating Wessex: the forgotten county.
Have a good weekend team!
tonight - hip hop/b-boy/dance/comedy show at sadlers wells. yay!
tomorrow - maybe mahogany but most likely going back to my ma and pa's for food although i wouldn't mind going to see amerie at G-A-Y.
sunday - devastations at the spitz