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what do you do with the mess?
from at least a few minutes off, so i make adequate preparations
in an ironic twist
where someone had rubbed loads and loads of jizz all over my bedside table.
that kinda sucked.
that is forever burned into your mind.
The correct protocol is to jar it, label the jar and store it in a refrigerated area.
That's what you think.
for the starving millions to eat.
Good numbers there Andy. Good spunky numbers.
and send it to a news presenter of your choice
Got a mate at reading uni, who when he cant be bothered to get out of bed, he just goes ahead and comes all over his stomach. LOVELY
why do people share this kind of information?
he also likes to stick a digit up his arse if the regular wank is a bit stale.
a bit of cloth or towel.
I don't want to think about how often that DOESN'T get washed.
I've never jizzed in my pants but having seen this video, I now want to.
it doesn't taste very nice, well.. mine didn't anyway
justin timberlake is in that video
requires more attention
gripping my slimey willy, deposit the gunk into the loo, flush, wipe my hands with some toilet paper, wash my hands vigorously, and feel ashamed.
hehe, cock snot
I don't really think about it
It tastes of cinnamon, you'll love it.
(may require re-heating)
No wonder you're a virgin.
although I don't really fancy trying anyone elses, especially if I don't get to suck you off first, what's the point?
I think he plans on ensnaring females in a web of errrrrrrr
Are you wearing a snorkel right now?
He knows the procedure
she knows the procedure
She knows the procedure
1-0 to me then?
They know the procedure
He knows the procedure.
he knows the procedure
Thanks for the defence in my absence
every sperm is sacred and declare my cum encrusted hand to be a holy shrine.
They know the procedure too, obvs.
a song by Bob Seger
knows the procedure
it certainly knows the procedure.
so that we can televise the procedure.
it knows the procedure
on your body and wipe off yes, on the floor then wipe yes, personally straight into a soft tissue... never straight in the hand. incredible.
which must be doing the yanking.
maybe i should invest in some sort of wanking machine just so i can catch the discharge. and maybe, just maybe i will put a wicket keeper's glove on.
What the fuck it wrong with you?
you're a freak of nature
and then you will become the master of the standing in the shower wank.
They generally want you to contain your fluids until they are ready to accept them. Grossly unfair.
Just let that arching flume of jism splatter onto your stomach..........then get Mumsy to bring you a lemon jiff wipe
I'd feel uncomfortable knowing my parents or sister might come in (lol) after I've been whipping up a love storm in there.
is my favourite new phrase. Thank you
....you'll be fathering a child that's also your nephew
-'no reason mum'
It's just what this board needs, im glad i res-errected (ha lolz) it from the depths of nearly 2 years
no way, I'd not realised.
good work! :)
this is great, and pretty fucking bizarre in places!
tissue in hand, cum in tissue. Or stomach and wipe is all good in my book.
I used to know this kid at high school who would do it into his hand and then spiderman it onto his roof. Fucking disgusting but he was a proud man of that off white, ripple effect ceiling.
Jizzus christ guys?! it gets tangled in hair and all crusty and YUCK
that kind of helps with the messy man juice situations
plus yeah its usually when I'm still lay in bed, before having a shower.
I can't believe I'm talking about jizz like this with guys.
If its an impromptu wank, getting tissues can ruin the moment a bit, and if you're in your room you dont wanna go walking around the house with a chubb on looking for the kleenex. But stomach. JJEEEEBBUUSS NAH
...which I have rebranded a 'Jagermeister wank mat''