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- Mount Kimbie - Cold Spring Fault Less Youth
- Baptist Generals - Jackleg Devotional to the Heart
- Tribes - Wish to Scream
- "More bands should split up" - Brett Anderson opens up to DiS about the return of Suede
- CocoRosie - Tales of a GrassWidow
- Laurel Halo - Behind the Green Door
- Frankie & the Heartstrings - The Days Run Away
- Drowned in Manchester #15 – May 2013
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spiderman
Surely this thread ended with this post.
SURELY.
smear it on your mums face
SEA GULL!
i can normally see an orgasm "coming"
from at least a few minutes off, so i make adequate preparations
^^^^ POTD
Lol
Same
jeans...
wipe it on a plasterer's radio
in an ironic twist
ladt week i was in a hotel
where someone had rubbed loads and loads of jizz all over my bedside table.
that kinda sucked.
you sucked the jizz?
yum
I think that may be an image
that is forever burned into your mind.
*hands
...
The correct protocol is to jar it, label the jar and store it in a refrigerated area.
I'm glad I don't have to deal with such dilemas.
...
That's what you think.
True.
hair
gel
send it to africa
for the starving millions to eat.
There's that much?
Good numbers there Andy. Good spunky numbers.
i feel sick
:) :) :)
pop it in an envelope
and send it to a news presenter of your choice
but really, everyone uses a tissue right?
Got a mate at reading uni, who when he cant be bothered to get out of bed, he just goes ahead and comes all over his stomach. LOVELY
how do you know this?
why do people share this kind of information?
he was hungover
he also likes to stick a digit up his arse if the regular wank is a bit stale.
Top guy
my mate has a "wank rag"
a bit of cloth or towel.
Grim
I don't want to think about how often that DOESN'T get washed.
it doesn't full stop...
Same here. Mine is a Jagermeister beermat.
''I sometimes think about eating it.''
..............what?
jesus christ, man
jesus christ
You've outdone yourself
I can tell you now
it doesn't taste very nice, well.. mine didn't anyway
^this post^
requires more attention
That's Frank 'The Cum Guzzler'' Hannell....don't worry about him
WHAT THE FUCK, how did i miss this belter?! Explain yourself, sicko!!
this is the unsexiest exchange of words about a sex-related topic that's ever been written
I'll send you some of mine in a jiffy bag in the post
It tastes of cinnamon, you'll love it.
(may require re-heating)
Having a taste of my own is fine
although I don't really fancy trying anyone elses, especially if I don't get to suck you off first, what's the point?
cheers anyway
While on that subject:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4pXfHLUlZf4
This has killed me.
I've never jizzed in my pants but having seen this video, I now want to.
this
is brilliant
i can't stop laughing
seriously.
help me.
:D
justin timberlake is in that video
Walk the short distance to my bathroom,
gripping my slimey willy, deposit the gunk into the loo, flush, wipe my hands with some toilet paper, wash my hands vigorously, and feel ashamed.
Give my todger a wash too.
slimey willy?
nnnnniccccccceeeeee.
hehe, cock snot
Wherever it ends up
I don't really think about it
Your room must be a state.
No wonder you're a virgin.
see this
http://drownedinsound.com/community/boards/social/1862143#r2707473
I think he plans on ensnaring females in a web of errrrrrrr
Oh Jesus, I feel sick
How can you not think about it?
Are you wearing a snorkel right now?
Call the cat into the room
He knows the procedure
call Cat Dealy into the room
she knows the procedure
call cat stevens into the room
He knows the procedure
call kat slater into the room
she knows the procedure
call cat power into the room
She knows the procedure
call cat woman into the room
She knows the procedure
TOTAL MINDBLANK :(
:(
1-0 to me then?
call cat cattington into the room
He knows the procedure
call (kerry) katona into the room
She knows the procedure
call catatonia into the room
They know the procedure
Call Gene "Catman" Vincent into the room
He knows the procedure.
call kurt vonnegut, author of cat's cradle into the room
He knows the procedure
Call Salem Saberhagen, cat to Sabrina Spellman, into the room
He knows the procedure
call topcat into the room
he knows the procedure
call Cat, a popular character in red dwarf played by Danny John-Jules into the room
he knows the procedure
call Jimmy Carr, host of the popular TV quiz 8 out of 10 cats into the room
he knows the procedure
call Katatonia into the room (remember them? LOLZ)
They know the procedure
I've already done that one
Massive fail
:o)
Thanks for the defence in my absence
call the Cat in the Hat into the room
He knows the procedure
call the Catholic church into the room, they inform me that
every sperm is sacred and declare my cum encrusted hand to be a holy shrine.
They know the procedure too, obvs.
Call Katmandu, as sung by Cat Stevens, into the room
a song by Bob Seger
Mr. Seger, of course,
knows the procedure
Call a catheter into the room.
it certainly knows the procedure.
Call a cathode ray tube into the room
so that we can televise the procedure.
Call caterpie (of pokémon fame) into the room
it knows the procedure
i have never heard of someone catching it in their hand
on your body and wipe off yes, on the floor then wipe yes, personally straight into a soft tissue... never straight in the hand. incredible.
That's because you only have one hand
which must be doing the yanking.
a valid point
maybe i should invest in some sort of wanking machine just so i can catch the discharge. and maybe, just maybe i will put a wicket keeper's glove on.
You stand pointing your screwball penis into the lavatory bowel for the entire wank?
What the fuck it wrong with you?
i couldn't bash one off standing up
you're a freak of nature
Wait until you move in with a woman
and then you will become the master of the standing in the shower wank.
Why would I bother when I could be splashing that ghost paste across her back?
In my experience they don't like you doing that.
They generally want you to contain your fluids until they are ready to accept them. Grossly unfair.
It doesn't matter - I empty when ready
Innit.
Just let that arching flume of jism splatter onto your stomach..........then get Mumsy to bring you a lemon jiff wipe
you should write erotic fiction
he already has
see above
I couldn't wank in a loo.
I'd feel uncomfortable knowing my parents or sister might come in (lol) after I've been whipping up a love storm in there.
whipping up a lovestorm
is my favourite new phrase. Thank you
You're welcome!
If it lands on the seat...and your sister sits down for a piss....
....you'll be fathering a child that's also your nephew
I really wish you hadn't said that.
I really wish I hadn't done that.
'why are you mopping in there?'
-'no reason mum'
*safety wank
Grab my flatmates milk carton from the fridge and top it up.
this is in my top 5 threads
EVAH!
Yeah and mine
It's just what this board needs, im glad i res-errected (ha lolz) it from the depths of nearly 2 years
ha
no way, I'd not realised.
indeed
good work! :)
haha I didn't even notice
good work
ha
this is great, and pretty fucking bizarre in places!
Why in hand
tissue in hand, cum in tissue. Or stomach and wipe is all good in my book.
I used to know this kid at high school who would do it into his hand and then spiderman it onto his roof. Fucking disgusting but he was a proud man of that off white, ripple effect ceiling.
Why is stomach and wipe ok?!
Jizzus christ guys?! it gets tangled in hair and all crusty and YUCK
Don't you wash or shower yourself?
that kind of helps with the messy man juice situations
just wipe it up, doesn't leave nothing to get tangled up
plus yeah its usually when I'm still lay in bed, before having a shower.
I can't believe I'm talking about jizz like this with guys.
I mean, in hand makes more sense,
If its an impromptu wank, getting tissues can ruin the moment a bit, and if you're in your room you dont wanna go walking around the house with a chubb on looking for the kleenex. But stomach. JJEEEEBBUUSS NAH
Seriously....I wipe it on a Jagermeister beer mat...
...which I have rebranded a 'Jagermeister wank mat''
so much insight
:-\