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and make up ludicrous facts.
Bjorn Tore Kvarme
or is this not another of those threads?
the player-kit man role is one of the funniest things i ve read...still laughing
why would you say that?
I have something i want to add.
It's a wonderful resource. Needs a link to said worship thread though surely
about Jesus... that's made me giggle far too loudly for by colleague's liking.
Bible bashers I suspect. I have added a tale of celebrity gladiators.
"Eric Hall - monster monster?"
that's amazing :D
I added the player-kit man and Simpsons legal wrangle.
added the first 3 paragraphs, bar the 'Otto PI' bit (which is great)
the celebrity gladiators tale
the doping scandal
thats twice I have laughed at you today. A new record.
that was absolute genius. I'm sat here still laughing and dribbling.
I bet guntrip suggested it should be deleted.
start one about Justin Fashanu being a bummer then - see what happens?
he's watching me type right now!
I assumed you were happy it was being deleted.
I apologise. Still, fun whilst it lasted eh?
Ricky Otto is a professional footballer. He is considered by many to be the greatest player to have never been capped by England.
His legend has recently been fondly remembered by online community Drowned in sound.
Ricky was best known for his spell at Birmingham, where he scored an astounding 283 goals in one season. Many felt this was due to the inspirational man management skills of Barry 'Big' Fry. His fame on the pitch was transfered to the television when he starred in Ricky Otto P.I in which Ricky Otto played Ricky Otto P.I, a likeable but uncompromising private investigator solving mysterys in the Torquay area.
Ricky is now thrilling crowds in the Cherry Red Counties League Premier Division with his displays of wing play reminscent of a fully fit Tony Daley with Surrey side Chipstead. He was appointed player - kit man in October 2004.
Due to Ricky's outlandish dreadlocks, he gave off the impression of a "slouch" and, as a dramatic result, was the main reason England managers overlooked him. A dream move to Manchester United at the height of his career was called off after agreeing a 15 million pund fee - because he wouldn't, at Sir alex Ferguson's behest, shave off his Magnum tribute 'tache.
He also became embroiled in lengthy legal battle with makers of The Simpsons in the late 1990's over the use of his surname to portray Otto, the drug taking metal loving hippy school bus driver. Ricky claimed that managers were unable to seperate 'the real' Ricky Otto from the fictional Otto and led to the end of his professional career.
When not surrounded by the comfort and safety of the football club, he has to endure people yelling "Ricckkkkyy" and "Where's Bianca?" after people started to confuse him with Sid Owen of Eastenders fame.
In 1995, Ricky became embroiled in a bitter doping scandal. This was dismissed by Barry Fry as 'f*cking lunacy'. He went on to state that Ricky 'was always this f*cking good'. Eric Hall, Otto's agent at the time, simply stated 'monster monster'
Ricky famously never wore any form of underwear under his shorts, on religious grounds.
It is impossible to say the word 'Otto' backwards without laughing.
Otto hit mainstream success in 1996, by setting an all time record points score on 'Celebrity Gladiators'. John Fashanu was so stunned by Otto's girth he could not even cry his accustomed 'AWOOGA'
Otto is one of five people who has ever written a letter to Jimmy Saville without requesting anything.
this is one my favourite things ever <3
this is getting silly now.
I suggest you all do the same before it is banished.
Does he really play for Chipstead? I used to play for Chipstead - its just a little village team!
play for Chipstead, but it felt good at the time.