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In a positive way, in the sense of someone trying to point something out that needs improving.
I can take one better than you, you fuck.
a big difference between an insult and constructive criticism. As I'm sure you're fully aware.
you don't believe that any insult has an element of truth in it?
An insult may be based on a truth but once articulated in the form of an 'insult' the origin has been lost.
I think perhaps what I just said isn't correct in every instance but probably in the majority of cases.
if someone calls you a cunt, you don't really think "hmmm yes, i should really work on that aspect of my personality".
and openly endorse it.
Thoughtless insults aren't good, though.
I am an insult
I was 'too fat' to be in a band and at 22 I was 'a bit past it' - it seriously messed with my head. Cunts.
when people think that they are giving you constructive criticism but they really arnt, its just harsh insults and digs which frankly arnt needed.
My driving examiner was like this too me. The decrepit old cow! She passed me though, it was just what she said how she said it kinda thing.
ie don't accept. If someone nicely pointed out something that needed improving to me, I'd have a go at doing it. Actually, I probably wouldn't, because I'm lazy, but I'd agree with them...
I wasn't even that fat - just 'broad shouldered' - anyway the band changed their name to The High 5 so I think I got off rather lightly there even though I had to take a pillow with me everywhere for about a year in case I started weeping uncontrollably everywhere I went - I even left town on the night of their first gig I was so jealous!
if someone does say something infused with a little malice but, on reflection, has some truth to it as an observation.
Is it possible, when the reactive response to the insult has subsided, to realise that the comment has some validity?
I haven't had many malicious insults directed my way.
I did used to get some about being flat-chested, but then I grew some breasts ALL BY MYSELF. That showed 'em.
it's fine if it's from a friend, but if someone randomly came up to me in the street and told me I needed to do some exercise or something, I'd be a bit annoyed.
Has it happened?
and as I was tall and broad shouldered eveyone reckoned I was hard an good at rugby when all I wanted to do was to write lyrics and stare dreamily at archetecture - I still have a hang up about being tall even though i'm only 6ft1!
Your driving test?
Yes to all three. You big dangly mirror-signal-manouevre pissflap.
and how accurate the insult is.
When it's someone online who's never met you, it's generally not accurate or justified enough to provoke much serious introspection.
Also, pretty much by definition, an insult is going to be something that one is unlikely to take constructively.
"When it's someone online who's never met you, it's generally not accurate or justified enough to provoke much serious introspection." Very true.
I was hoping this would be a thread where JD insults everybody to see if they can take it. But in answer to your question, no.
I believe so.
insults make me cry.
I am fragile, like.
but I feel precisely the opposite :)
As for whether insults or constructive criticism I think it depends on the context and what's being commented on. I think I find it easier to deal with insults if it's something I'm secure about or constructive criticism if it's something I'm not secure about.
If someone insults me on my songwriting (which happens a lot) or my personality (which fortunately relatively rarely) I'll almost always laugh if off because I've got enough confidence in both, as well as knowing that other people feel positive about me and any opinion given will be subjective. However if someone who likes me makes constructive criticism about either of these I then find it harder to take because I felt secure about them and now someone's saying they could be better and I get this paranoia that maybe everyone has a problem with me and no-one's saying anything!
If, however, someone commes on something I feel less confident about (for example I'm pretty insecure about my looks) then I'd rather it was constructive criticism. I know I could make more of an effort with my appearance so I'm generally grateful for someone telling me this (in the right way of course) but insults will just completely sap my confidence.
Did any of that make sense?