Your are viewing a read-only archive of the old DiS boards. Please hit the Community button above to engage with the DiS !
some of these are priceless http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/mbfansforum/F2154396?thread=3289396
most of them are about as good as my stories. not my stories about one night stands, i dont do that because im a good jewish boy.
You remind me of someone...
why is this on the bbc?
It's like feminism never happened
its not as if I didn't tell you what the link was all about. Now go find your mummy, she'll give you a big hug and tell you everything is ok
actually written in english?
i like the uses of "auld" and wee and so on.
the one about the sash makes a bit more sense now though.
Blackpool a few years back- me, cousin and his mate. Got to end of the night and we picked up 3 fat howlers- 2 sisters (twins) and their mate, all from Alloa- back to their digs wi my cousin and mate arguing over which one of the twins was the ugliest!! In an effort to get out quick I started pumping the other burd only to be joined by the 4 others in the same double bed- it was horrible wi rolls of blubber rolling about everywhere and they 2 still arguing about who was the ugliest. Glad to say I finished first and split rapido before a Japanese whaling ship took an interest in them.
"was pulling this french piece"
'In Ibiza, with this burd out on the balcony.
She is on top of me, taking swigs from a litre bottle of vodka while 'getting down'. She tries to pour some into my mouth, but with her rocking is making a bit of a mess of it.
So I take the bottle off her, and start pouring some over her t1ts, then reaching up to lick them. I then get a bit ambitious and start pouring some down her clevage, letting it run down past her belly-button piercing and trickling down onto her blurt.
She slowly starts rocking up and down wild, really tensing up her face, starting to really grip onto me, really getting into it through gritted teeth.
I'm all like, "Yes, am a pure stud, sending this girl crazy".
Its only after a few moments of this, that she hops off me quickly, clasping her bearded clam.
Turns out, the vodka we were using was proper nasty Spanish stuff, more like window cleaner that a vodka. The alcohol strength was so great, it had literally burnt her beef curtains. The screams of "joy" I thought she was giving me were actually squeals of pain as she desperately tried to communicate that her baldy man in the furry rowing boat was being badly burnt.' lol
'baldy man in the furry rowing boat'
if that guy isn't a fucking builder...I'm Elvis Superman
and bearded clam.
none of those stories are even remotely amusing...they are just 1001 bullshit tales made up by a load of brickies and cab drivers who are too fat to have even seen their own dick for the last ten years...