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his children laughed at me
then swore again for swearing in front of them
i was a mess
Do you love me?
the kindness of strangers.
into your arms.
things just haven't been the same in the cave family unit
the boy's next door
he signed my book
& i left the shop, was almost sick outside tescos
Are we to believe that you had a chance meeting with Mr Cave whilst you just happened to have a copy of one of his books on you? That's too much of a co-incidence, there's more to this than meets the eye.
Unless of course he just signed your copy of 50 shades.
was banging on the door trying to get in, but the proprietor said she was banned. Cave said "Oi, let Love in!"
knocked her armour
and then decided he'd get another one for his mate, former Manchester Utd & England left-back Paul Parker. "A box for black Paul" he asked.
My jokes may be appalling but in my knowledge of 80s/90s football I bow to no man.
you know that one that comes in blue cans and is good for defining your stomach muscles.
it think it's called Ab Artois Blues.
Yes - let the Bells ring
for making a shit joke even shitter.
and he hasn't made a decent record since. If the above story is true, it suggests he's back on the bottle which could mean a return to form.
...that i've been waiting for?
of a blue nun's heart
I once met Nick Offlicence in a cave.
give his kids a slap with his red right hand.