Logo
DiS Needs You: Save our site »
  • Christina Vantzou - No. 4 about 22 hours ago
  • The Fangasm: The Midnight Organ Fight by Frightened Rabbit about 23 hours ago
  • Laura Veirs - The Lookout 2 days ago
  • Eels - The Deconstruction 2 days ago
  • A Place To Bury Strangers - Pinned 2 days ago
  • "I am fascinated by art that asks a lot of questions": DiS Meets Jenny Wilson 2 days ago
  • Planet Gear: Erland Cooper 3 days ago
  • Evolution and Equilibrium: DiS Meets Wye Oak 4 days ago
  • Logo_home2
  • Records
  • In Depth
  • In Photos
  • Blog
  • Podcast
  • Search
  • Community
  • Records
  • In Depth
  • Blog
  • Community

Your are viewing a read-only archive of the old DiS boards. Please hit the Community button above to engage with the DiS !

Boards

Music Social More…

Musician jokes and cartoons

sputthenick [Edit] [Delete] 22 replies 13:33, 8 December '11

Recently, I have seen a number of cartoons that present musician jokes. Do you know some of the typical musician jokes of funny pictures or cartoons that you can look at online? What is your favorite joke about musicians? What instruments do you guys play? Do people sometimes tease you just for fun? Have you been victim to some of these evil musician jokes?

Share on
   
Love DiS? Become a Patron of the site here »

View Nested Linear
  • Yes, I DO know some of the typical musician jokes of funny pictures

    or cartoons that you can look at online!

    My favorite joke about musicicans is this:

    What do you call Phil Colins?
    Anything you like: he's a twat!

    The instruments I play are: guitar; recorder; piano (exclusively the first few bars of the moonlight sonata) and something that sounds funny (wait for it wait for it).... a BAGPIPES!
    Sometimes people DO tease me just for fun!
    I have not been victim to some of these evil musician jokes.

    Thanks for asking!

    thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:01 | X
    • I liek the joke about the duck and the oven and Bill Withers

      -dan- @thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:09 | X
      • What did Bill Withers call his duck?

        thewarn @-dan- | 8 Dec '11, 14:26 | X
        • Oven the duck

          -dan- @thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:27 | X
          • Correct!

            What did Bill Withers call his fish?

            thewarn @-dan- | 8 Dec '11, 14:29 | X
            • anything he liked; it couldn't hear him!

              robluvsnic @thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:40 | X
              • Correct! Also:

                Salmon Dave

                thewarn @robluvsnic | 8 Dec '11, 14:46 | X
    • What's the definition of perfect pitch?

      Throwing Phil Collins into a skip without him touching the sides. What do you call a drummer that breaks up with his girlfriend?
      Homeless. What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
      A drummer. What's the difference between a drummer and a drum machine?
      You only have to punch instructions into a drum machine once. How many drummers does it take to change a lightbulb?
      Just one, so long as the roadie gets the ladder, sets it up, and puts the bulb in for him. How do you get a drummer to stop playing?
      Put some sheet music in front of him. What's the difference between a drummer and a Certificate of Deposit?
      The Certificate of Deposit eventually matures and earns money thankyou I'm here all week.

      -dan- @thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:14 | X
  • Did you hear about the bass player that was so bad, that the singer noticed?

    Annoying_person | 8 Dec '11, 14:36 | X
  • what do you call someone who keeps talking while the music's playing?

    a rapper.

    robluvsnic | 8 Dec '11, 14:39 | X
  • what did thom yorke say when he was baking a cake

    i've got mix on my toes es

    happypenguin | 8 Dec '11, 14:42 | X
  • Did you hear about the bassist?

    ME NEITHER!

    thewarn | 8 Dec '11, 14:47 | X
  • What was the last thing the drummer said before he was fired from the band?

    Can we try one of my songs

    dave_5000 | 8 Dec '11, 14:56 | X
  • Why does my mate keep drumsticks on his car dashboard?

    So he can park in disabled spaces.

    hip_young_gunslinger | 8 Dec '11, 15:09 | X
  • What do you call a trombone player with a year planner?

    An optimist

    Annoying_person | 8 Dec '11, 15:29 | X
    • What does a stripper do with her arsehole before she goes to work?

      Helps him put his drums into the van.

      dirdyboy @Annoying_person | 8 Dec '11, 15:32 | X
  • Rossi and Parfitt let me backstage to eat their crisps...

    They had no quibbles. I had Quo's nibbles.

    basil | 8 Dec '11, 17:17 | X
  • How did Bob Marley like his donuts?

    with jam in.

    What did Bob Marley say to the Wailers when he gave them donuts?

    I hope you jam in too.

    OLD BUT GREAT (like me)

    Stuzza | 8 Dec '11, 17:39 | X
  • Where's the punchline here?

    sputthenick is going to plug his musician-jokes website, right??

    questionmark | 8 Dec '11, 19:38 | X
Share on
   
Love DiS? Become a Patron of the site here »
View Nested Linear
« Back to Music forum

Report this thread
Drowned in Sound
  • DROWNED IN SOUND
  • HOME
  • SITE MAP
  • NEWS
  • IN DEPTH
  • IN PHOTOS
  • RECORDS
  • RECOMMENDED RECORDS
  • ALBUMS OF THE YEAR
  • FESTIVAL COVERAGE
  • COMMUNITY
  • MUSIC FORUM
  • SOCIAL BOARD
  • REPORT ERRORS
  • CONTACT US
  • JOIN OUR MAILING LIST
  • FOLLOW DiS
  • GOOGLE+
  • FACEBOOK
  • TWITTER
  • SHUFFLER
  • TUMBLR
  • YOUTUBE
  • RSS FEED
  • RSS EMAIL SUBSCRIBE
  • MISC
  • TERM OF USE
  • PRIVACY
  • ADVERTISING
  • OUR WIKIPEDIA
© 2000-2018 DROWNED IN SOUND