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He sounds like Jack Nance in Twin Peaks
nowadays
There was a FISH in the PERCOLATOR
I loved Lou's track on Plastic Beach (Some Kind of Nature) but it makes me cringe; is it just me, or does it sound like he's having trouble with his dentures there? That's not a joke about his age -- his pronunciation's all off, like he had a stroke.
That said, I really kind of hate this collaboration. I don't know what Metallica bring to the table. I'm listening to Lou's track The Blue Mask as I type this, and damn, the man does not need Metallica to bring the heavy.
so boring
i got about 90 seconds in and couldn't be bothered
I am the TAAAABLLLE!
Hetfield's voice sounds good, shame Reed gave him the worst lyrics.
It's shocking
but I still found myself listening to it.
Shit
Hahaha
golly
is it underrated?
It's amazing, my fave of theirs, but in terms of thrash it gets a fair amount of props
not known anyone hate it, but i know what you mean
And yeah, I used to wish there was more bass, but it wouldn't be the same.
Nothing by Metallica is undera
ted
shit
Am I really the only person that doesn't mind this?
Oh wait
I just got to the bit where he declares himself to be a table...
i am the tablol
because it's a metaphor for his life!!!!
When he disguises his body in the shape of a... <cough>... table... IT'S HIS ART!!! etc.
This song is truly poor
anyone else think
this is a really rubbish attempt at Lift to Experience?
sounds like William Shatner at times
It's records like this
that make you wonder who the fuck is running the show.
Nowhere along the line has one of Metallica's/LR's managers/A&R men felt compelled to say:
'I REALLY DON'T THINK SO'.
Someone should be advising the artist(s). Therefore, someone is not doing their job. This was and is a terrible idea, obvious from the day it was announced some months ago. That an entire fanbase can see this but the management/record company evidently cannot is frankly shocking.
Where the fuck was Lars' dad?! That guy surely knows what a sack of wank this project is.
Disclaimer - yeah, i'm going off of one track. But this is surely a signifier of things to come.
um
metallica and lou reed are METALLICA AND LOU REED.
they can do whatever they want, with whoever they want. it's just a bunch of old self indulgent musicians doing whatever they want.
it sounds like ass but it's completely meaningless
Of course
but they are still part of a corporate organisation, and at some point in that chain of command, someone surely ought to have flagged this as a total fucking joke.
It's easy to assume that major labels are run by robots, but there's actual human involvement outside of the artistic group here that is just as accountable. They know that this is a turkey, and they've allowed their artists to embarrass themselves.
A&R stands for Artist and Repertoire, remember.
Also
'It sounds like ass but it's completely meaningless'
huh?
It's rubbish but it's ok cos it's completely meaningless? I'm not sure i understand.
I agree that both artist's stature has undoubtedly afforded them such vanity projects, but really, i'm amazed someone hasn't stepped in and had a serious word (especially having seen 'Some Kind Of Monster'). We all (mostly) agree that this is a bad idea, now imagine that you are Metallica/Lou Reed's long-term manager or A&R man.
My point is that, regardless of misguided art or intent, someone clearly isn't doing their job. If Metallica want to put out a total shitter of a record with Lou Reed, then their people ought to have let them quietly slip it out with no fanfare and no anticipation. This record has had a lot of publicity. Journalists have been played it and had to sign forms forbidding them from speaking about it before a certain date and Indie-schmindie websites will certainly review it for no other reason than to point out how FUCKING SHIT it is (wasting precious attention and webspace when they could be telling us about GOOD MUSIC WE MIGHT LIKE) It's been made into a big deal when really, it's pretty much a piss-about that's been knocked up in a lunch hour.
So. You know it. I know it. Everyone around Metallica/Lou Reed MUST know it.
How come no-one told them it's a BAD IDEA?
Sorry for the rant x
I basically agree with this
Especially since these are 'tough times' for the industry.
There was some other collaborative record recently that made me wonder why nobody involved above the artists had realised what an utterly terrible idea it was. Annoyingly I can't remember what it was now...
You're a bit wound up there dirdyboy
It's not against the law to release an album, even an ill-advised one. The world would be far more boring if all unwise ideas were stopped before they came to fruition. You need a little light relief from time to time, surely?
Besides which, A&R is just a parasitic function and ought to have no place in music at all.
They're no Iggy Pop + Sum 41
actually, ignore this
I always though Sum 41 backed Iggy for the entire Skull Ring album, but Wikipedia tells me this wasn't the case.
they might as well have
^this
I still wouldn't have listened to it more than once. Mind that's more than I managed for The Weirdness (got about halfway through).
They deserve each other
Lou Reed was finished 35 years ago. Metallica is nothing but a stupid metal band. I hope they're happy with each other.
Sounds like a shit Peer Amid
And Reed is no Higgs!
I actually like it
Listened to it about 5 times yesterday.
this thing is so terrible
I can't stop listening to it though. The crash cymbal. The bits where Lou Reed sounds like he's doing a Hetfield impression. Aw man.
best Last FM bio ever:
http://www.last.fm/music/Lou%2BReed%2B%2526%2BMetallica
have you checked this now?
there's a photo and everything
look!
http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/500/69375342/Lou+Reed++Metallica+iamtable_260911043142.jpg
that kick/bass drum is repulsive
Still can't believe how barrel-scrapingly awful it was
Metallica St.Anger-era b-side with overdubbed geriatric ranting. It's an absolute shocker! This might have sounded like a good idea in 1986 perhaps...genuinely shocked that no-one who knew both artists pointed out that they've clubbed together to make a gigantic steaming turd of a record
would YOU say that to Lou Reed and Metallica?
Really? you have the balls?
No
because it's NOT MY JOB.
Not everyone surrounding an artist is a 'yes man'.
It's no one's job.
You have clearly
never had any dealing with A&R men.
It's all very well say that they're parasites, never the less they do exist and it's their job, especially in the corporate realm, to advise their artists accordingly.
I think you're missing my point:
Why would Lou Reed take advice from anybody? What does he care? What does he have to prove, at this point?
(My other main point is why would an A&R person know better than the artist what the artist wants to do?)
actually listening to this again for comedic value
one of the few songs that gets worse the more you hear it. Can't stop laughing when he says 'I am the table.' It doesn't help that he says it like 4 times in a row.
just saw the comment on soundcloud: 'he must be talking about databases'
aaaaahhhhhh tears. please someone photoshop something involving roots, tablets, tables and databases.
i for one am eagerly anticipating the album
it's like something that Shatner would do
if he was covering a St.Anger song :'''(
Seconds in
And already it's excellent.
His voice has sounded like this for years, but he hasn't been this heavy since The Blue Mask.
I was already so excited about this album, but now I really cannot wait.
http://userserve-ak.last.fm/serve/500/69375342/Lou+Reed++Metallica+iamtable_260911043142.jpg
:')))))))))))))))))
AMAZING!!!!!!
Brilliant!
They should tour with Spinal Tap
Tap can run through their Jazz Odyssey then Metallica and Lou can run through Lulu.
I still fail to compute how this band have managed to follow up 'Justice' with over 2 decades of consistant shit.
they should put him down
i listened to more than 90 secs now
I AM THE TABLE! amazing. it sounds like a joke/parody
Absolute dogshit.
Just like we all knew it would be.
Speak for yourself, Andrew
I've been looking forward to this for months and, judging by that song, I don't think I'll be disappointed.
hi James Hetfield
You are the table and I claim my five pounds!
Just wanted to say
Four days on \m/ "I AM THE TABLE!!!!" \m/ is the funniest line of any record this year. I haven't heard comedy genius like this since Trapped In The Closet.
When it's revealed that Trey Parker and Matt Stone are behind this it'll be a wonderful day.
eeeeee
diddly-diddly-twang-NEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWWW-diddly-weeweeweeoooh
"KIRK, YOU'RE A CHAISE-LONGUE!"
NEE-NAH-NEE-NAAAAAH-wahwahwah-noodlenoodle
"LOU, YOU'RE THE MUTHAH-FUCKIN' BOOKCAYAYAYS-AH!!!
Could have had a fantastic tie-in with Ikea, wasted opportunity this...
If there's a worse record than that released this year I don't want to hear it
OK Lucien
I want you to go to Spotify and see how much of the Superheavy debut album you can listen to.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Searching_for_Major_Tom
(actually really looking forward to it. THE COVER. THE COVER.)
I AM THE TABLET!!!
But which one, Ipad or Samsung Galaxy?!
leaked
and it's nearly 90 minutes long