Oh yeah, just like the prodigal son I returned... but a bit late because I had to do the washing up for my mum... being the gun of sod, I mean son of god... nope, the first is more accurate I think. Anyway, being IT isn't easy ya know?
Oh yeah, if Chewbacca the Wookie got it on with Wicket the Ewok, would that constitute paedophilia?
Papa Roach's Last Resort = Brainstew by Green Day... oh yes!!!
I think you can tell that Feeder are based in London a lot. Lets look at those 'Buck Rogers' lyrics shall we?
She's got a brand new car,
Looks like a Jaguar,
It's got leather seats,
It's got a CD player!
'So what?' I hear you cry. Well, if they were from Liverpool surely the song would go more along these lines....
She's got a brand new car,
Looks like a Sierra,
It's got bucket seats,
And a stolen tape player!
And with me, being from Essex, this is what it would sound like if they were from my neck of the woods...
She's got a used car
Looks like a Skoda
It's got furry dice
And a dodgy hand brake!
So, geography is important in music... I mean, imagine Gomez lived 40 miles west of their home town of Sheffield and lived in Oldham... they would get lynched for 'Gonna Get Myself Arrested'.. either that or it would become an anthem.
Another lyrics gripe here. Faith No More's 'Easy' (OK, so they did the cover version...bite me!) :- 'That's Why I'm Easy, Easy Like Sunday Morning!' OK, 2 things... if you been out drinking on the Saturday, Sunday morning are in no way easy, and if you haven't been drinking, you have to watch Sunday Morning TV (which I believe is the handy work of the devil... even Sunday Worship!)
Crap joke for you now... how many members of Ocean Colour Scene does it take to change a lightbulb? The answer is 4... one to go up the ladder, two to hold it and one to go and ask for Paul Weller's permission.
OK, who has the best hair? Wayne from Static X or Morrissey I believe both to be great feats in constructive barnet development.
Todays charts are covers I THINK bands should do for the irony factor :-
1) Someone Always Get There First (Bennet) - Gene (Yep, The Smiths did)
2) Enjoy The Silence (Depeche Mode) - Catatonia (I would if Cerys would shut the fuck up)
3) Nancy Boy (Placebo) - R.E.M (I say no more)
4) Freak (Silverchair) - Celeine Dion (Part Human/Part Horse... all shit)
5) Blind (Korn) - Rachel Stamp (would explain the make-up)
6) We're Not Gonna Make It (Presidents Of The USA) - Cradle Of Filth (And thank the powers that be for small mercies)
7) The End (The Doors) - Hole (Your career path in a nut shell)
8) You Love Us (Manic Street Preachers) - Gay Dad (Do We?)
9) Learn To Fly (Foo Fighters) - Daphene & Celeste (Preferably off a VERY tall building)
10) Wanker (Bennet) - Robbie Williams (*grin*)
Unfortunatly my fellow followers (especially young Mark... who I now promote to Paladin Of The Madness for his support of my stupidity) we have come to the end of my silly rantings... possibly permanantly (all good things come to end... and shit things come to an end even quicker... just check the message board!) But, to end on a suitable note... 'Which did you like better? Jedi or Empire Strikes Back?'