Boards

Brilliant little pop ditties with lyrics perhaps not as sharp meet the might of 80s goth rock.

Soul diva backed by meat-based percussion instruments

Pop punk revival that always sing the first verse twice.

Don't say a livin' on a prayer for me now

Chirpy moptopped guitar poppers who went all serious after being accused of not writing their own material

Really, really shit.

Prog rock in sharp suits

Jagged noise rock with lyrics focusing on power, glory and metal. Also, loincloths.

Classic riffs played on aluminium guitars

Laconic Aussie stalwarts reveal unexpected political edge

Hey yeah you with the sad face
Come up to my place and *REJECT YOUR DEMOCRACY ITS ALL A BIG SHAM*

The road to tell is perfectly soundtracked by the Sultans of Shit.

Just simply one of the best electronic bands you'll ever hear!

YOU'RE-AH LOSING YOU'RE-AH VITAMIN CCCCCCCCCC WOOOOAH YEEEEAH HAHA! ZAH! OOOOOHHHH!

Twee 1940's Goth

Potentially the hardest rocking pop act, more likely they'll never get past the fact the white guy had better hair/afro.

Songs about schoolgirls and animals sung over sexy synths and downtempo beats

Alex Chilton takes the middle section of Holocaust to its natural conclusion

Blues rock whining at its finest

Coke-addled wails sprawl over tender acoustic ballads.

Dunno.

Sampled Garage Rock. Not for the faint hearted.

Rock n' Roll theatre loses its shit and goes Brit.

Danish dance pop with 5-minute guitar solos

Lo fi Hillbilly experimentalists

Un-happy house

And the crowd say Bowie selecta

Not sure, but it definitely involves denim.

flagging Brazilian Nazi pleasure beat-combo.

Grunky.

featuring hit single I Want To Know What Yr Boyfriend's Party Scene Thinks Love Is

Slump around.

probably a bit concerning, i would suspect.

Peter Hook hits double-nostalgia paydirt with his reimagining of 'Closer' as a collection of 90s floorfillers. Views of former bandmates not known.

took too long over that and someone's done it

G.M.T.V. Music

Get ya hands off Joan of Arc, motherfuckeeeerrrr

Self-explanatory

Meandering post-rock interrupted by occasional shouts of "YEEEAAAA-UUHHHHH!"

Baroque Pop for sophisticated munchkins.

Indie rockers chill out.

Anglo poppers discover their cheese eating surrenderist tendencies.

Enya is da shit.

Declining popularity sees former popular proggers despatched from a great height.

Less prolific rock pioneers.

Pop eats itself.

Something about Dark Mavis vs. the Beautiful People

I'm a fucking idiot

DiS abuse of blues rockers gets out of hand.

only listen to the first two records and don't bother with the rest

Atmospheric jazz rock with downtuned hardcore guitars

Too many tranquilizers.

In. His. Dreams.

Traditional British folk regularly interrupted by lengthy saxophone solos

Seveal Pitchfork journalists just read this & wanked themselves to death

Music for bombing over Penines in your robin reliant.

Latin jazz-rock fusion, NSFW

..would jump around if only they weren't entranced by their shoes....

The sound of New York City: fresh hip hop with live feedback wigouts.

Extended guitar workouts for the long sighted.

I`ve not heard `em lad.

Norah starts taking lots of acid & beating up her band members

Gloomy atmospheric post punk with manic shouting and the occasional noise-prog-punk spazz out

Al Jourgensen goes all ethereal

Electronic body music with a bit of slap bass

A vocal quartet specialising in slow-paced atmospheric ambience.

standard sort of X-Factor pop music, except the album's have about 7 discs and each song - though adhering to the tried-and-tested pop structure - lasts about 20 minutes.

Pop punk with insane rambling lyrics; Pete Wentz tried to write some of the lyrics but Mark E. Smith projectile vomited on him before firing him from the band

Grrrl band angry at constant lineup changes

Smooth Gangsta Jazz.

Billy Corgan has another attempt at Christian rock; it's just a LOT noisier this time.

Track 1. Agadoo (27:35)

The room's spinning...because of the gayness

Fat Korean bloke dances like a horse while soundtracking 1980s US college movies

Mark E Smith finally wreaks his revenge

Angsty dynamic nu-metal. Broke up after their second album, due to getting the masks wet taking the front cover photo.

Unbelievably heavy.

PBR&B with raging, hateful breakdowns.

Pub rock overload

Hellish soul-reggae/no wave fusion from an indolent pop star and nihilistic New Yorkers.

Bruno MARRS

Two trailer park girls in the ring, tralalalala

The Hull band's single "Sheep" was strangely popular in New Zealand

Delicate acoustic folk combined with aggressive pelvic thrusts and the occasional "oh-we-oh-ooooooh" thrown in for good measure.

Twelve-minute remix of the Plow King jingle.

Geordie pop duo sing chirpy songs about WW1 & their vaginas.

Great music and the lyricist is utter fucking shit.

No longer housewives' favourites.

Frightening perm/beard combination

Grohlface Killah and crew bring the pain, nice-guy rock style.

The debut album, Enter the Foo-Tang (36 Colors and Shapes):

Hey, Johnny Blaze! (Intro)
Can This Call Be So Simple
Learn to Flyumph
Incarcerated February Starfaces
F-Low-ers
Alone + Uzi Target
My Poor Brain Ain't Nuthin' To Fuck Wit
Protect Ya Headwires
Winnebago 500
Stacked Like That
Da Monkery of Wrenchboxin'
For All The Cows of Flying Daggers
X-Staten Go Hard
Cold Day in the Sunshower
Duel of the Beaconsfield Mic'ers
Shimmying After Ya
Crimineverlong

Scousers take on hip-hop. Not as good as Goldie Lookin Chain (although funnier).

C.R.A.P. Music

Swedish genre-hopper hooks up with noseflute musicians from Burkina Faso to soundtrack tampon ad