Lot to get through so here's some bullet points

*Arse get a hilariously scabby win in Brussels
*Liverpool get twatted with crushing ease by Real, somehow Balotelli's fault
*Dortmund get back to winning ways against a typically obliging Galatasaray
*Ludogerets and Olympiakos continue to be pretty amazing
*Everton fans get attacked by 100(!) Lille fans, presumably this means Europa tonight
*City get hurt feelings over losing their arses in Moscow

Go.