Is your middle name Donald?
Are you pleased with the progress you’ve made this week?
Could you spot, name and capture (for treatment purposes) 25 feathered friends on your walk to work?
Are you frequently disappointed by freshly painted double yellow lines that have been painted over autumn foliage?
Dare you dream of a room filled with balloons of multiple colours?
Did the dealings of your arch nemeses diminish below generally accepted appropriate levels in the 7 months to March?
Are you looking forward to the next generation of traffic congestion measures?
Swag?
Are you ready to metaphorically burs the next person who incorrectly postfixes the word, “self”, to any word whatsoever?
Is your space being infringed upon by empty jars (specifically but not limited to products with a scoville rating of over 500)?
Can you maim, whilst simultaneously cause negligible distress?
Do you pay out at a minimum of 70% of what is paid in?
Would your view be markedly improved by swivelling by less than a 45 degree angle?
Have you taken out a loan, credit card or whatever else PPI was sold with whenever PPI was sold incorrectly with whatever PPI was sold with?

If you are finding yourself answering, “yes, that certainly applies to me”, to more of these questions than you are finding yourself answering “thankfully I don’t fall into that category”, to, then the person answering the phone with the number (+Swansea)211845 would probably appreciate a call from you.