They're nice, aren't they?

All polished and shiny. The trouble is, I only know one American girl local to me and she's married. She comes from South Carolina, used to date a cop and hates guns.

I'm not looking for one with one of those godawful Boston accents though or that New York accent which that tarty bint who fancied Chandler from Friends had.

Please apply below if you feel that you would be suitable for this position.