why god why? i have one in half an hour, just me in my office, then like 10 other people from various different organisations. i don't have a clue what i'm talking about because i'm standing in for someone who's been on holiday the best part of the last two months and just left the instruction 'just keep them interested and stall them'. they're all going to see straight through my ruse, and it's going to be broadcast across the world over what is potentially the *worst* means of communication ever invented.

down with conference calls!