OK, so someone on here tried to convince me that i should, in fact, go to BK because they now had veggie options (of which i was unaware).

Plod, plod, plod to Burger King and find that of their two options, only one is actually veggie friendly. So "hey - one is better than none, gimmie one of those bad boys. And make it a meal, sugar-tits. Diet Coke for liquids".

For four pounds fifty this is going to be pretty damn good, eh?

"Urrrrgh - the horror! What has happened to oesophagus?!?", I shrieked. "What a flimsy, soggy vulgar piece of food. I'll take your Boots meal deal any day, thanks."

And so ends the story of my first trip to BK in 7 years.