(or how to be successful in your posting endeavours)

Hi Guys!
As a successful poster of successful threads, I know what it's like to be great. So, I'm here today to share my wise ways with you all. Listen up, you might learn something about how to make great threads on here that everyone will want to be a part of!

1. Don't just make a statement and then put DiScuss at the end. Make the DiScussion your own!

2. Be controversial for maximum posting profit. As Rule#1 states, do not just post a controversial statement, involve the other users by asking for their opinion on the matter.

3. Post. About. Sex. It will never fail. Ask the other users a question about sex. Everyone has an opinion on sex, and it is normally a strong one. (see http://drownedinsound.com/articles/1404366)

4. Don't post more than one self-centric thread a day. Very rarely do other users get any joy from reading about other people's lives and having to hand out advice five times a day to the same person. If you'd like to talk about your life in such explicit detail, use the Blog function! At least then if no-one cares they can avoid it easier.

5. Ask questions about other people. As Rule#4 makes clear, people LOVE to talk about themselves. Make a thread asking about their childhood (see http://drownedinsound.com/articles/1360270), their weekend (http://drownedinsound.com/articles/1398039), what's good/bad in their lives (http://drownedinsound.com/articles/1405312). The only downfall in such threads is that it tends to bee 100+ unique replies and no conversation. Everyone just hands out their opinion.

Can anyone else give out any hints on how to make successful threads on DiS?