Sometimes I love the DiS board, sometimes I hate it. I thank it for introducing me to certain people. I think those people know who they are. The people who come with me to football matches, the people who trek to Belgium, those who dance with me to amazing Detroit techno at 10pm in a half-empty east London dive.

I've made some genuinely great friends on here and had some good times.

10,000 posts. Yes.

-------

Mitchell or Webb?

Webb. All the way to the bank.

How do you sell ice cream to eskimos?

Try clever marketing. Flyers, TV advertising - that sort of thing.

what do you think of the new stupid computer! tracks?

genuinely pleasantly surprised.

who're your top five DiSers that aren't staff?

sorry i need seven.

Rapscalion-Jones
Bamos
nice_squirrel
homesick_alien
i-deserve
wishpig
fionapinkstars

what is the exact value of pi?

In the Lock Tavern, £7.50. Mine's a Lamb & Rosemary.

what's your favourite DiS moment ever?

I get a sadistic kick out of every argument, which is sad. I think the January Barfly show is probably the best thing I've been involved with though. Still the busiest night in that venue ever.

why 'crablin'?

Why not?
?what's the best rhyming couplet you ever invented?

I am putting some finishing touches on three tracks that will be on myspace soon. Then, you can choose.

how big's sean's willy?

Impressively girthed, is Adams.

did you delete the band profile for Jwo and the lemonsharks?

No. I have absolutely no idea what you're talking about. I like your face though.

why is your willy shy?

:(

Can you or can you not, divide by zero?

Don't even start. Seriously.

Who would you Shag, Marry or Kill from volcano! ?

I would marry all of them. They are three of the loveliest musicians I've ever had the pleasure of meeting.

So about this airport extreme card thing once I buy it how do i install it into my eMac?

There is a little hatch where you fit RAM near the back - it goes quite neatly in there.

If you had to decide... between DiS or Transport Tycoon, which one would it be?

Transport Tycoon.

would you rather marry steve jobs or ryan adams?

Ryan Adams. I'd just want to talk to Steve.

The BEST thing on ableton live ?

Syncing it (via MIDI) to external instruments and then triggering ludicrous loops whilst dancing around the lounge.
?If I use it too much will it make me sound like a shit 65daysofstatic ?

Maybe, but you could also end up like Germlin - bonus.
?Favourite band/artist at the moment ?

Guillemots.

How do you pronounce !!! ?

LOL LOL LOL

All things considered... ...how the fuck have you managed to keep your job for so long?

All things considered? Let us consider some things.
Since I took over as Editor 16 months ago, DiS' weekly unique readership has risen from 78,000 to 127,500, we're curating stages at festivals around the world, have been well embraced by the press, introduced some splendid new features and curated a wildly successful podcast. As a result, we're doing a lot better than ever before and as editor, I take a good deal of the responsibility for that. My conduct on the message board is a separate entity and away from how I conduct myself as a business and journalistic professional.
Thanks!

But how long is your willy *flacid*?

Not so good.

beard no beard posse vs meatland?

Now THAT would be a fight.

aim to fail and you succeed...what have you done?

Define success. If you're happy, then you're successful and as a result you can never truly 'aim to fail'. It's a headfuck when you think about that for too long. I like it.

also, is this a question?

Yes

oh, and are we free?

Not enough.

Are you God?

Allegedly.

How did you get to be the Editor of Dis ? That wasnt meant in a sarcastic way or anything, just what did you before that got you to where you are now ? Any tips on making it in "the biz" ?

Honestly? I pestered the shit out of Sean. I worked in the office for free on days off from the Underground, helped wherever I could and 'proved' myself.
I'd known Sean fleetingly from when I used to work at the Anti-Nazi League, working on the Love Music Hate Racism initiative in its formative years. I'd always loved DiS and we were enlisting their participation in the tour.

what did i, did i dooo wrooong?

Nothing really. At all. In fact, I like you.

which disers would you feel comfortable with as a step dad?

Comfortable, or happy? I'd be comfortable with most people on here. I'd be happy with i-deserve.

Moc moc a moc?

RING-SIR!

why are northern ireland so shit at football?

because they lack the undeniable SKILLZ of 'arry as a coach.

can a moustache with short hair look non-gay? i want a moustache but i have short hair.

yes, but it needs to be a 'scruffy' moustache, rather than a perfectly coiffured slug.

what is your favourite limp bizkit song? you're not allowed to say none/all of them.

Nookie.

if you had to drink a pint of sweat or eat an inch of poo, which would you choose and why?

eat an inch of poo. i don't get on well with overly salty substances.