1)Dijobouti Allstars - Taleex Funeral Fusion Is On!
2)Pharoh Sahure - Dance Mothers Slowly
3) White Star Blue Flag - White Star Blue Flag Plays Gay For Johnny Depp Covers
4) Shermarket Stalls - Death Jazzcore Remixes
5) Ogaden War - S/T

It staggers me how you hipsters go around listening to the same bloody music all the time! Just because a record happens to be good, or well-written, or of-a-type-you-really-like doesn't mean you should be trumpetting its greatness all the time.

If you're going to listen to Animal Collective or vote for Wild Beasts in your shallow conservative little end of year list then frankly you are no better than the besuited scum who buy coldplay albums in Tescos. You may as well buy a semi-detached home and start playing squash.

In my unending quest for cool points I have sought out for my end of year lists ONLY RECORDS NO OTHER SOD HAS HEARD, thus that I may lord it over you all. Check it:

www.myspace.somalian_death_not_really_just_a_stupid_satire.com

Actually, please don't check it. Then I'd have to stop liking it.