Based on past experience of trying to organise a fucking meeting between you bunch of useless twunts, I'm taking the lead and putting my foot down.

All those going and planning on meeting me: I will meet you at 12.30pm on Saturday outside Mile End Tooobe station. Do not be late, because I don't stand for lateness one bit. Careful Johnson, this includes you, so I can give you your ticket and you can give me some money.

OK? Ok. Good. See you all there. Sign below so I can text you abuse if you're late.