There you were, posting on this internet forum, thinking you had something to say, most likely about music in some form or description. You enjoyed the varied community of users from all sorts of backgrounds talking about things new, old and everything in between. You saw threads that related to your favourite band and felt warm inside when others were saying nice things about them too. You found a place you felt welcome, a place you belonged.

You started replying yourself, just something light hearted at first, but before you knew it, you were making jokes, starting threads and wasting so much time at work. The lurking days were over and you felt like the big man on campus making contributions that other people were agreeing with and ^Thising. It was a golden age for your self esteem.

Then it happened.

You made a hipster comment. You unearthed your inner hipster. Look within yourself and you will find the truth. deep-blue's algorithms are more sophisticated than us humans can comprehend. It has absorbed terrabytes of data across the internet distinguishing sincerity from neediness dating back decades to trace the sources and trends over time. It has found patterns in user behaviours that correlate in ways that would shock the average human, absurd without the data to back it up. For example it found a 0% match between people who like the band Garbage and those who care about being cool. These people could be trusted to have zero care about how others perceived them and were comfortable with this choice.

You're here because you did this. You made that comment. You cannot argue with the computer. That hipster is you. You are a shitty person and should feel bad. Question your life choices. Look within yourself and you will know it's true. Think back to what made you this way in the first place. Turn this into a positive, make the change that counts.

It hurts so much when deep-blue do what he do.