During particularly annoying colds / hayfever / blockedupnoseness:

Taking the middle bit out of a biro so you just have the tube, working it (perhaps with the aid of lubricant) slowly into your nostril in a futile attampt to reach that possibly nirvana-like moment when you manage to force your blocked airways open and breathe through the makeshift airway.

If I ever achieve this, I do not doubt it will be better than a lorry of orgasms.