Wendy_Roby

Thank you for breaking your habit of lurkerising to say nice things, it means a great deal. I am a bit bored by Twitter but will no doubt pop things on my pointless blog from time to time, when I am not teaching / writing books. x

That is dead kind. Although you get one more week before I disappear (and the wonderful Rob Leedham takes charge of the sevens). x

Go forth, be TESTY

I don't know what your comment means

Whamsayin is, this sounds by numbers *for them*. It gives me no pleasure to think or say this. I usually find every note they fart out absolutely irresistible.

He is a talented, charming dude, that one. Thanks Jimi!

...I'm taking that wimme to the gym.

Not brilliant if you're trying to put your column to bed at 1am though. He makes my brain go wakey.

Can I present for the cogitation of the jury that I had two hours sleep and am not werry well? Or must you take away one of hard-won indie stripes.

(You're right, you're right, I don't deserve 'em.)

Do you know, mikelaurie, due to my selfless (paid) work at the Rock School where I am mentoring (bossing about) sound engineers, I now know why that waveyform looks the way it do. But if you think I am going to try and explainify it here, you are mistaken. Still, K-X-P are good, no? They are playing in Britain's London this week I believe.

I thought it was a hactual man. Does this mean I have to start reading press releases properly because I NO WANNA

Do you mean, he does it for jokes, or that he himself *is* jokes? Me: I think he largely gets away with it.

was not single of the week. There wasn't one because this week was too six-out-of-ten and borang. x

Make up for this vulgar omission by listening to nothing else for the next fortnight. Also, thanks for calling me young.

It will also learn me to read promotional stickers properly, rather than just being a smartarse about them. Amended.

Obligatory (but entirely sincere) 'fanks for still being one of my favourite commenters' reply. x

..that this is a silly story. Told in a daft fashion. With the obvious air of truthiness, versus stone cold fact. But I am glad you have the other side! And honestly wish I had seen it.

...without coming across like a gushy twit. So I stopped trying, and gushed like a twit. 'Phenomenal' nearly (nearly) covers it.

I have called it that because of the marvellous video, which *was* called The Wilderness Downtown, but do of course stand corrected.

As for Mairead and Tabitha, I think you'll find they're called the Queens of Noize. No zed in Queens, smarthouse.

I believe the song is about Marine Le Pen, there is a YouTubular here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpU6pUJ1hI0. I am now going to correct my copy so that your comment looks incongruous and wholly mad. x

...and bearing in mind he's a studio engineer for some fairly wonkaloid modern sounds - all he's said here is that the NNF's programme is 'a little bit safe'. Which is not the same as safe, per se. I don't think anyone would argue that the NNF's programme isn't diverse or (dread word) eclectic. But I think it's also fair to say that it would be nice to see a bit more contemporary new music in there. A bit!

Lully piece, Mr. P.

The delightful PR man has just informed me I LIke Trains I Like Tea "is actually loose leaf.... we just gave journos some tea bags to help."

I don't understand you, world.

IT'S AMAZING: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wCuTrfTfGd0&feature=related

I mean, seriously. HWAT? You wrote "Steve Miller's Abracadabra isn't a good song". Read it back 'oceanRain', that is totally what you wrote up there. If that were true, then how the giddy heck do you explain the RAW FACT I listened to it FIVE TIMES since BUYING IT on SATURDAY in the CANKER CHARITY? Explainify me that, fancy chops. Sorry, what's that? OH WAIT, you AbracadabraCAN'T.

My musical short-cutting got me precisely nowhere and very secretly I still want to be her out of Brassed Off. Your dedication is to be admired, Sir. (I used to work in a call centre. It'll pass.)

A lot of my family live or are from that part of Middleshire and once I went to a church which had heaps of plaques about signif. Robys. I am probably some sort of overlady slash mistress which makes you all my serfs. Please, for the LOVE OF GOD, will one of you go and get me a Double Decker.

Or maybe it was East, I forget. They lent me a euphonium because I couldn't afford one. It looked like shit, it had no shine, but it was mine. It wasn't mine, I had to give it back.

Trombone players were 'alright' I thought. Not like cornettos or trumpeters who were cocky little uckfers. I remember a lot of prissy, clench-bottomed snobbery if you weren't doing music GCSE (which I wasn't). WHO'S THE WINNER NOW, EH?

I would like some more information on this book you mention, even though I feel it is incumbent upon me to remind all readers that the pedigree of the Robys is beyond all doubt and question. Also, I just goggled it and got habsolutely nothing. Chrisk, could you be an awfully good chap and swizz me a link?

I quote: "Instrumentals are all very well, but they have to go somewhere. And this doesn't go anywhere." :(

...you record yourselves reading John Banville/Nabokov or sim. and post it on a non-abominational internet-based dating portal. I could quite happily be told to darn socks and renounce femmism were someone to say it in such a way.

My Dad once told me 'Nobody likes a smartarse'. I do not concur and am well in favour of them. You are quite right chrisk and know a great deal more about tin hats than I.

As for you Jimi - whenever you are prompted to comment I take it as a sign that I am on the right track. x

...nothing I've written before has been this wonderfully received. More than anything, it's testament to just how much love there is in the whirl for plastic. A delightful snippet from an email received from Mr. Jonathan Edwards (oh hello: http://bit.ly/gNHQa9)

"I couldn't get this all across in 140 characters so I feel I have to follow up my comments by email (a letter would be more apposite but sadly less speedy). I've got really vivid memories of going into a tiny indie record shop in my town when I was 13 and buying Hatful of Hollow. The shop was painted black, was full of big kids with haircuts and even an Alsatian I seem to remember. I felt like I'd joined a gang. A true rite of passage moment. I remember going to Probe in Liverpool in my teens and flicking through the racks whilst trying not to make eye contact with the worlds grumpiest (but strangely charming) record shop assistants. All their records had handwritten stickers on them - some recommendations, others (perversely) savage critiques. I'll never forget the mauling one poor customer got when he brought his copy of Loveless back to say it was warped. I've got similar Pavlovian reactions to records I bought in Parrot Records Cambridge, Cob Records Llandudno, Piccadilly Records Manchester and even Fopp (the Bristol branch in particular). God love record shops and the physical world.

I'm very fetishistic about records - mine still have all the price stickers attached. I like the price stickers. In Woolies they used to put a little sticker inside to say when it was bought. My copy of Doolittle has the sticker with date of my 18th birthday on it and my copy of Off The Wall is from a few days before Christmas from when my parents bought it for me when I was about 10. Seems like a lifetime away. Cue reverie...."

Lawks, you humans! x

But I will play your game nonetheless, because it is my favourite game. However I shall *not* play it if we have to use the terminology of that demented nitwit Jenny Frost, she is INSUFFERABLE. She presents a programme about NATURAL BEAUTY, Blackjack_Bauer. She has FAKE BAZONGAZ. I find myself firmly on the side of those admirably stoic Northshire girls, with they tiny skirts and they massive hair and they No Coats, even when it is perishing.

ANYWAY.

PUSHOFFACLIFF: WOOOOOOON. I like that tache, but I am liking it from 'afar', and not 'up against my facehole'.

SNOG (I prefer pash, but you know, whatever): MOCKASIN, because however darling his Kiwi accent is, I could not spend the rest of my days wedded to someone who called me 'Windy'.

MARRY: Blake. I haven't checked the sales figures, but any man who can fashion a language out of ladysighs and communicate with actual SILENT BITS is alright with me.

Oho, I enjoyed that a little too much. Do forgive.

Grab your woo number, Daddio, pour yourself some neck oil and let's get our collective gauges up with some RAW TRUTH and POETRY MAN x

...you mine, having ripped it (just DM me). What an ackfing wicked label this lot are turning out to be. x

...as we have learned this week, not all art is about daisies with kittens for petals. Sometimes it is about GOING HOME TO HAVE A WANK BECAUSE THAT MAKES YOU BETTER AT BALLET.

Honestly. What an habsolutely hilarious film.

P.S. Do not worry, all is tickety at this end. I am going to play air hockey today. Air hockey! I am well going to win, anawl. x

...has the unfortunate effect of putting me in mind of the detestable Gok Wan, but I shall follow this link you mention Jimi, thank you for your continued enthusiasm.

Also: please can we have more spats about pronounciation. xx

My brain is GAWN, very possibly left in Oslo. Duly amended. x

You dreadful gadabout, you. One minute all the giddy in the world, and the next all like YEH BOI, WEWL SHIT :(

LOVE THIS. They are RAD. Everyone who does not like them is well BORANG.

I got all excited, I thought when you said make-up you were going to hook me up with some well rad eyeshadow tutorials. DISAPPOINTING.

It is too late, you have ruined the comments on my column. I am crying now, you have made me cry.

As for you, JaguarPirate of Dread, may I remind you we do not deal in wrong rand here. Just my peculiar taste, and yours, and that of the denizens of the internet.

Delighted you found something you can pash on. x

eg "You've got some good lines"

xxx

Danielson! Danielson! Danielson! Danielson! Danielson! Danielson! Danielson! Danielson!
(Danielson)

Although while I am here, may I respectfully arx, who exactly is 'she'? How bad and rude of you, kowalski.

WANNA GO

And yes indeed it is! I am glad you like it, everso. x

As for you NeillyNeil, I am glad you have enjoyed the wordsplurgery, even if I feel it is incumbent upon me to point out that I am a dreadful liar and make things up ALL THE TIME. The fun thing is hiding the REAL TRUTH amongst the pork pies. Mmn, pork pies, I love they.

Merry Christmas one and all, even if I am allergic to Dog! xx

...to do your chart, it is intensely pleasing.

As for Plants & Animals, having had hardly any time for halbums this year I have only had the single. But I am very glad you have found something in here that brings you joy. x