Stealthy

What does it mean for illegal downloading to drop "70%". Is there actually someone employed to sit down and count how many files are being downloaded on the internet and to sort through which ones are illegal?

Q. If that was true, why not the same levels of antipathy towards... say, Anal Cunt? Or any number of randomnoise bands?

A. It's because they're just shit.

Who are these bands that are pretending to be something they're not? What does that even mean?

I see - who knew "ho hum" could encompass such layers of meaning?

For the record, I don't read Pitchfork - I have good taste in music.

I would like to talk more about your review though. You talk about how "it must be applauded that three teenagers have actually chosen to get off their backsides and be creative...". I think you are who is missing the point - this is not just the age of the download, but the age of freeware, cheap studio gadgets and easily pirated DAWs. There is literally no excuse coming out with a record like this unless you're purposely trying to be a hipster douche, or you're too inept to sound any different.

Or both.

P.S. Arse Full of Chips are just a shit Macc Lads. They're not even Grind, FFS!

Yes, I know Americans are expressly forbidden from listening or reviewing any music that isn't American, but I think this guy should be allowed for getting it on the money: They can't play, all their songs sound like shit (over and over again) and no real label/producer would touch their shit with a bargepole - hence the 'DIY'.

Basically, they're like Anal Cunt, but not funny.

I see we're using the Chris Rock sense of "Keeping it real" here: Niggas/DIY Hoxton Punk bands love to keep it real. Real dumb.

I preferred this: http://pitchfork.com/reviews/albums/13442-hey-friend-what-you-doing/

I think I agree with Patrick Wolf - People who illegally download his albums should have their internet cut off. And their heads.

Also, I don't think Lily Allen has considered that perhaps some of the opposition to this idea stems from the belief that if we give someone the power to cut people off for downloading music or shut down P2P sites for sharing these files, what else does that person have the power to do?

I'm guessing this passed her buy because she's never had to think about an issue beyond the immediate, most personal level before - being as she is, a well-to-do nothingcore muso with a crack team of session musicians and industry fixers to do all the work.

"...it comes as a disappointment that Turner hasn't yet worked out what makes him the phenomenal songwriter that he so often is."

Blastbeats and Chugga Riffs.

The appeal of Guitar Hero is the appeal of almost all games: You get to simulate an activity that would otherwise take years of training/negating of the laws of physics to perform in real life.

If you can't understand this, then you are legally dead. Sorry.

Additionally, this dispute is retarded. It's a fucking AVATAR of some guy. No doubt many people have had the idea to create a character with floppy blonde hair and a stripey jumper - you know, like how he looked in that one photo once.

Foo Fighters, Courtney Love, Everett True: All cretins.

P.S. That said, we really should pay Frances for the rape.

With due respect - you (or he) just pulled that out of the proverbial arse. Discounting that as a mere prole, you have no idea what processes led to the creation of this, or indeed ANY album you're not intimately involved in the creation of; you can however, see it's plausible that a group of musicians with the resources to spend large amounts of time in practise rooms and studios - with large orchestras, top tier producers, engineers and the like, all with a big record compant administering the process - can probably said to have planned their music out a bit before committing it to tape.

But that's just my conjecture...

And of course, 'experiment' does as you say, literally mean 'to try out'. So who here is doublewrong, again?

"Experimenting doesn't mean to try everything"

That's exactly what experiment means.

You think wrong.

"The symphony on the end is perhaps a bit much..."

Which is exactly why I will be buying this. I'm not interested in artists who give a fuck. I could go out tomorrow and get 17 records that sound exactly like The XX, no problem. Who else makes music even remotely like Muse?

Sure, it could still be shit (I didn't really like the last one), but fuck it, let's do it anyway - which is what all good bands should be saying when they write their music.

This list is insulting to women. It should have read:

- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- The Great Kat
- Katie Melua

Would the lead singer of Dragonforce have a mental on stage? No.

Read into that what you will...

Critics: They know the way, but can't drive a car.

Maybe this album doesn't deserve such a low mark - but at least the reviewer took the time to justify his rating through the medium of an actual review. Where's your justification?

Sounds like you put as much thought into your baseless accusations as Starsailor put into their cliché-leaden lyrics. Jog on.

ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU! ZU!

A lot of words for a jumped up text message.

1) Rhetorical question: What does it mean to believe in music? Delete that phrase.

2) Remove the numerical ratings from reviews if you want to
a) Encourage your writers to refine their feelings until their opinion on even the most average of records isn't in doubt.
b) Encourage readers to actually read reviews and think about what the words might mean.

3) Stop telling us what you're doing every five minutes and do something.

4) More blastbeats.

"Traditionally, early January is a time for broken resolutions, all your friends claiming they're off the drink for a month but lasting less than a week" and feature writers beginning articles with a comment about how people make resolutions at the beginning of the year but generally don't keep them up.

Also: "...except that Crystal Castles are slightly more distorted and mostly better" - the lesson this sentence teaches us is that if you try to write a single review and put make-up on your Bratz doll simultaneously, you will probably fail at both.

Please post a pic of the Bratz doll.

Erm, the bullshit lazy Christmas list article season is over. Get back to work.

That's the best they could do? Good riddance to the place.

They just listen to it.

"...the screaming staccato guitars and oblique free jazzing seem to flail around with no logic or design, but every now and again you’re blindsided as it coagulates into a groove of dumbfounding potency."

The flailing around is precisely why the ensuing grooves sound so amazing. Get off the fence and admit to yourself that Zu were incredible.

"...its impact as an amalgam of art-pop and prog-pop"

My worst 8 words of the year.

NICK NAYSMITH.

You ignore that people generally trust reviewers, not reviews. If Roger Ebert for instance, gives a film a bad review, I listen. If Mong_478 gives the same film a bad review, I just don't care. Especially seeing as he can't spell.

Word. You only had to look around at the London gig to see this was true: Hundreds of people doing the low bow. It was glorious.

I have it on good authority that Robert Trujillo knows Kung Fu. And that James Hetfield used to drink a lot. And that Lars Ulrich likes Venom. And that Kirk Hammett is gay and wears leather trousers.

Glasvegas ain't got shit on them in a fight.

"If you didn't spend so much time listening to that Sub-Pop shit, you'd know how to mic a drum." - Damon Che to hapless sound tech.

That's the one thing I know about this label.

Given that he started off as Chandler from Friends, it'd be a distinct improvement.

Nice try. Bands who deserve prizes don't win them.

In all senses of the word.

A bigger contrast? You mean "A contrast" surely?

From this list I can surmise that Barack Obama is actually 10 years older than he makes out and white.

...and that John McCain is a massive gay.

It wasn't exactly U2 in the house that night, no.

I'd guess their back catalogue took up more space than the amps.

Was it just me, or did they play one song twice? Though I wouldn't be surprised if it turned out just to be the same song that lasted half an hour.

I've just come.

Now for a hard six - Dillinger and Slayer. COME ON!

HOT!

Also: Center justification? Wild stuff.

http://tinyurl.com/yopc3f

Sorry, man.

Their lyrics have actually gotten better...

What else are they going to do? Wail and rend their garments?

If the pressing is fucked up, then the only thing to do is repress without the fuckup and take the financial hit, right?

John Lydon? Intelligent? When did that happen?

Does he think he can't be compared to Scouting For Girls? THat's pretty funny.

Surely it was both - they attacked and lay siege to the place, then were the unfortunate victims of a Soviet counter attack at which point they were surrounded and themselves besieged.

I too, have watched Peep Show. And read a book.

This seems to me more Mojo than Pitchfork. Though I see why this might be confusing to you since both concerns agree that Oasis are shit and their fans are twats.

Attendants deserve it for liking gash acts.

I only know about this due to the terms "Lily Allen" and "Botch" calling me like a siren...

Can they take those stupid masks off, please?

Trying to work out where I'd heard it before was doing my head in. Then magically, the Jaco version popped up randomly on the iPod the other week. All hail shuffle mode!

Addendum: One aspect of this band's music that I feel lifts it above many others, is that many of the songs do a great job of evoking the character of the subject. This was all well and fun on Dinocore where some of the lizards had their own little themes, which would sometimes be reprised in the context of other songs (and on one occasion - another album).

Tyrant, while not going as far as the aforementioned Dinocore, takes this to another level, as befitting the heavier nature of the subject matter. Hence the uniquely African nature of Idi Amin's despotism being bookended by some lovely Charlie Parker-y jazz bass, and the traditionally jolly fat image of Henry VIII being subverted by suitably pompous stabs of brass.

The best examples in my opinon both concern Russians. A huge combination of strings and guitar more than adequately puts across Stalin's responsiblity for tens of millions of deaths - making him arguably the world's 'best' tyrant. While Ivan the Terrible is a brilliant representation of the barely comprehending horror in the eyes of the man in Repin's painting.

The crushing metal that abruptly gives way to dare I say tender stringed instruments expertly tempers the brutality of the Czar's deeds with the personal tragedy and mental illness that plagued him throughout his life.

Admittedly, in all cases, this alliance of the lyrical and aural is hardly subtle, but it works. And more importantly, it's something you rarely encounter modern guitar bands even attempting. Perhaps now it's just unglamourous and/or nerdy for a lyricist to get out of his head and write about a subject bigger than himself (Free Nelson Mandela type songs excepted); let alone go so far as to do an entire album the same way.

Maybe we'll get lucky and find that in the near future, other bands will find the motivation to put their own unique spins on Down I Go's template. Because when it works, it fucking destroys faces.