Doherty, drugs, children: must be a Channel 4 show
Yup.
Channel 4 have approached Babyshambles singer Pete Doherty (pictured) to make a television programme about druggie teens, according to The Daily Star and, subsequently, NME.com.
The reputable red top reports that Doherty is to travel to a pair of estates to meet kids addicted to bad drugs - like, not Tunes. Heroin and crack. What our man Pete used to munch 'tween two slices of white if the sensationalist rags of this nation are to be wholly believed. He was bad.
But now he's good, a would-be/could-be role model for these disenfranchised teenage fuck-ups. Among the documented activities: Pete taking our tearaways to a pie and pasty factory.
Tasty. The kids in question can be found now on estates in Manchester and Sheffield. Soft southerners, sleep safe.
Of course, to be sensible for one second and rather less facetious, DiS recognises that any help these kids receive is a good thing, and if a dirty-nailed pop singer taking them to fill crusts with processed meat is gonna comprise an essential part of that help, it’s OK by us… Besides, we’re bound to end up watching the thing. Rock on, Pete.
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The Libertines
I didn't understand most of that
.
What?
Pete Doherty is going to film a doc with C4 about crackhead kids on estates.
Fair play.
is it going to be like this?
"me and Amy (Winehouse) used to do crack, the press loved it we sold loads of records, then we went clean. the records don't sell so much now"
Too many italics
[i]Too[/i] many? Yes.
(I realise that won't work)
How the hell is
taking them to a pie and pasty factory going to ween them off drugs? Are they crack-filled pies?
go away
Spammy
This is him actually doing some constructive
Let's suspend cynicism.
i can seee it now
a crack den slash shooting alley,
it is daytime but it is dark
the floor is crunchy
"when I was in the Libertines..."
asks producer if the kids can turn down the incessant trance music
"WHEN I was in the Libertines..."
asks producer if the kids can turn off the music
*music is stopped*
calmly
"when I was fucking Kate Moss...."
one kid unpeels eyelid and looks up
"me and Kate...."
kid holds Pete's stare momentarily, then slumps
"Kate said to me, You aren't worthless Pete, you can do ennyfink you want, (sly wink) including me, lover, if you think little Pete is up to it...."
kid dies of boredom. and heroin.
Pete turns to manager, who in this version is Grant Mitchell, and says
"I fink that went alright, dinnit..."
Pete picks up dead kid's needle and settles in for the (fort)night
credits roll
Channel 4 goes off air briefly then cuts to an episode of Friends, (The One Where Monica Is Caught Without Toilet Paper And Dies Of Shame)
Haha!
Brilliant.
^^^ post
of the century!
WHAT?!?!
When did Pete Doherty stop doing drugs??
:S
WHAT?!?!
When did Pete Doherty stop doing drugs??
:S
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