Span

Right here, right now, you might as well pour orange juice all over me and find the five bestest bimbos in Norway to lick it off and give me the key to their chastity belts. I’d not even blink - it just doesn’t get better than this! …Sorry, I’m over excited, smiling, deaf and not caring one bit. I’ll now start from the start…

SPAN, yeah, y'know we’ve been raving about them before and once again they do us, the people who’ve sniffed out these riffs, ramming the sweltering Barfly, they're about do us proud and remind us everythings alright, baby! There’s no hype to live up to tonight, otherwise this would be 3000 sweaty bods bouncing, rather than 300 of London's elite. Their cartoon rock poses and rainbow sunshine storm-clouds of positivity are at the ready, this my friends, BREAK A MICSTAND, this is the rock show to be a part of and this is what it’s all about… Ditties that will make you dry those fuck-me-they-sound-sooo-sexy lips with instant whistlable hits (aka Pop). Riffs that you, you Weezer-lovin, once-Greenday fan, once hipgunslinger who wore a pink-pocka-dot-bandana to a Guns 'n' Roses gig (yes, we know you did, we’ve got pictures!) will want to play over and over again on repeat. Songs, no, scrap that, ANTHEMS which make me wonder why no-one else is jumping around?!? I try my best to look cool, but fuck that, this band are like the big brothers everyone's ever wanted and I like them, which by association, cool, I am, maaan!

I feel so alive right now, like happy and stuff. It’s only 2 guitars, a bass, drums and 4-way vox but it’s as if I’ve been transformed into one of those perfect gleaming toofed stoopid-happy people from tv-world. Outside, it’s a whole different world of people moaning, taxes and whores, but it's correctly forgotten, cus right now, at this very moment with big Song2-parodying “WAH-HOO! WAH-HOO!” coming from ’Baby’s Come Back’ with added everyone in the room vocals. And then when ’Always Ends’ spins out like the Tasmanian devil crashing into a Kevin Smith movie set, I just know I’m witnessing a band who are truly special and very, very now and what me, you and every uninspired, spoon-fed, grumpy-faced rock kid needs. Why? For me it’s because I can’t stand most rock’n’scuzzy-or-whiney-boy-punk’roll that's about, it’s all been done before, romanticising and emulating rather than creating and blowing off heads. For the rest of the world, we've got too many problems to wallow (wars, laws, drug lords, racists... you name it, we got it!), we need entertainment and we need it now! These 4 Norwegians, all singin, all struttin, are all but ready (with a recent signing to Island/Universal) to take this carefree-injecting show on the road, baby!

...hang on, did someone offer scandanavian super models?