Boards
Cop Shows, Forensic Criminal Investigation Programs
It's like the writers thought: "Okay, The Bill has taken serious issues and reduced them to soap opera/movie of the week standards, so how can we go one step further? How can we do the impossible, and make crime boring? Oh, I know, let's examine the people who spend hours and hours examining a piece of fluff from the arse-end of a ball peen hammer. Good stuff."
Fuck off. Fuck off and die, CS-FUCKING-I, I HATE YOU AND I DON'T THINK YOU'RE MY REAL DAD SO FUCK YOU!
BTW, did anyone see The Bill last night? I shit you not, this is more or less how the whole episode went:
INT - DILAPIDATED BUT NOT TOO DILAPIDATED HOUSING BLOCK - DAY
IMPRESSIONABLE TEEN #1 (IT1): "I would like to buy some drugs."
DEALER: "You want some drugs? I can sell you some drugs."
IT2: "But it is my understanding that drugs are bad!"
DEALER: "What, did mommy tell you that, IT2? God, you're so square."
IT1: "To avoid being square like my friend here, I will buy and take some drugs."
IMPLAUSIBLY ATTRACTIVE FEMALE POLICE OFFICER WITH A BATON AND A MESSAGE (IAFPOWABAAM): "You should have known better than to take those drugs."
IT1: "I didn't take those drugs because of peer pressure, I took those drugs because my father puts too much pressure on me to do well."
AUDIENCE: "This is fucking ridiculous."
IAFPOWABAAM: "Luckily, we've realized we will never be The Wire so have gone for self-parodying middle-class liberal misunderstanding of serious social ills instead."
AUDIENCE: "Whatever. I preferred it when you were in Hollyoaks getting your tits out for the lads."
IAFPOWABAAM: "So did I, to be fair."
FADE OUT
We're now beyond the point of even trying, aren't we? On both the critics and the creators parts. Rather, we've just done the classical British thing and lowered standards. Should this come as a shock in an age when The Enemy are considered profound?
Now I'm going to try and do some work as my boss is heading over towards me.