Boards
I have to go to the NME Tour tomorrow
because I got a text last night from my editor saying "I've just put you on the guestlist for Does If Offend You Yeah? tomorrow".
I quite like them on record but saw them live in the summer and thought they were awful, and I just realised that the gig is actually the NME tour. Great.
The entire audience are going to be morons who I hate (Yes, that is a gross generalisation, but pffft).
Hypothetically speaking, if I were a lunatic, what everyday object would you suggest I take into the Academy that could be employed as a weapon to inflict severe maiming upon those in the crowd who will grind my gears?