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Giant Isopod to be the new face/body of Miss Selfridge
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This is Milly - the 22 year old catering assistant and part time glamour model from Dourbridge in Grimshire was described as 'thrilled' to have been chosen out of a shortlist of some 27 other crustaceans, molluscs & gastropods to become the new face and body of popular clothing shops Miss Selfridge.
Jason McSmith, spokesperson for the Swindon branch of Miss Selfridge, made the following statement:
"We at Miss Selfridge know that women are sick of stereotypical, idealised notions of what their bodies should look like. Size 0 stick thin models with flowing blonde hair and pearly white teeth are out.
"By using a slightly fearsome dome-shaped sea dwelling crustacean as the new face of our brand we hope to send the message that it doesn't matter what you look like, Miss Selfridge is for everyone! It will also scare off children and stop them hanging round the shops at weekends."
70s glam rocker Gary Glitter was unavailable for comment.