Boards
Russians by Sting: he's a very special little boy
I firmly believe that this is one of the worst songs ever written. Anyone can write a rubbish tune, boring lyrics, a plodding melody; but it takes a certain X-factor to come up with something like this.
Most of it's in the lyrics - come to those in a sec - but first check out the lazy, gentle mimicking of a stereotypical Russian march anthem. What a good idea! Check out the use of a ticking clock to drive the mid-tempo rhythm along; see, it's like how much time we've got left until the bombs start dropping! What a good idea.
But yeah, the lyrics. Amazing. There's something singularly offensive about Sting hoping that the Russians 'love their children too.' So what.. wait..? Why wouldn't they? Sting, are you suggesting that maybe the Russians -don't- love their children?
"I'm just saying, it's maybe something to think about."
No, that.. that is what you're saying. By even mentioning the issue, that's what you're implying. That there's a possibility that they don't love their children. That nobody from Russia loves their children.
"Just.. uh, just.. it's.. yeah. Think about it."
And tell me, when you hear the line "how can I save my little boy/from Oppenheimer's deadly toy" you don't imagine sting sat at a giant desk, a crayon clenched in his fist, writing his lyrics on an A3 poster sheet, his tonge stuck awkwardly out of the corner of his mouth, mumbling to himself: "boy.. deadly.. toy.."