I'm pretty average at everything. Apart from cricket, which I am officially brilliant at.

Game One: Bowling 4-0-34-2; batting 13.
Game Two: Bowling 4-1-11-1; batting 10.

I was compared to Maradona and more recently Darren Huckerby.

but then I stopped playing. I once Cruyff turned some sucker so bad he fell over.

I'm a bit better now- after going to watch games I've learned a lot more about positional play and stuff.
I've got pace to burn, but no physical presence.

slow as fuck but I had a good 'footballing brain' a la Teddy Sheringham. I did a lot of goalhanging, basically.

but probably not aginle enough. I have the stamina now that I didn't have when I was a kid.

I like a good tackle though.

my ball control skills are pretty good (sorry), but I haven't been able to run for shit since I started smoking

in Junior School - post Newcastle, so pretty turd.

the ball never goes in the direction expected when kicked and the harder i try to kick it the less it goes.

thanks for reading

very unfit, and guilty of dawdling in front of goal. But i can pass short and long to a decent level, tackle pretty well and can foul for England. i am also perfectly 2 footed, however, this can easily be construed as useless with either...

Played a few games at reserve team level for Non League sides and a number of trial games at pro clubs when I was 17. Out on pitch I can pick a pass but be left standing in a sprint with Jan Molby.

Bamos' cricket stats up there ^ reminded me of my one and only over of bowling for the school team.

1-0-14-0

Our teacher made me feel much better at the end of their innings by telling us that if I'd bowled all 20 overs we'd need 281 to win rather than 114.

mainly due to being

a) very tall

and

b) good at shouting meaningless phrases of annoyance at the defenders in front of me.

I had *trials when I was younger.

*Football and Criminal

I can play Winger or Up Front, and i m left footed. I used to play in goals as i m pretty good but dont really like playing in goals.

I like to think so anyway!

22 goals in 25 games for the past two seasons says I'm certainly decent for the level I'm playing at, anyway. No physical presence whatsoever though, and pretty woeful in the air unless I'm unchallenged. Can't tackle for shit either.

I'm playing in the BSM 5-a-side at the weekend, so I'm sure some people who post on here will be able to judge for themselves.

playing tonight. I used to be good, I won the 'Redditch footballer of the year award' for U16s when I was 11 (fair few kids), but then i went to a high school where they played almost every other sport except football. Carried on for my club but slowly got worse and eventually quit.

Now play once a week (tonight in fact), and occasionally twice or more.

I've only just learned the most basic ball control. :(

I still have decent touch but I can't run more than 10 yards without needing to stop for breath :(

but I know that I'm not really.

but i haven't played for a couple of months so i'll probably be really sloppy next time i try.

I am very good.

i used to play on the school team in primary school. i was one of 2 girls. but i looked like a boy so no one even noticed me rly.

I play like Kanchelskis, but you know, not as good. Awesome.

and breaking my previous record in the prcess. The last time i attempted sustaning a ball at altitude i managed to complete 5.

I conclude my coordination with both lower limbs has improved since i set record when i was 10.

i was alright, i suppose. now i'm not as good.

It's quite an acheivement.

whenever I'm playing with friends in the park, but as soon as I come up against someone vaguely skilful I realise I'm actually pretty crap. I'm definitely more of a cricketer.

I do have good memories of my performance in the DiS vs Rest Of The World football game in the mudbath at Truck Nine though :D

I'm an unthreatening winger or a shakey right back.
I try hard but then I run out of steam. I think I should play up front.