Now, this is not a personal dig at anyone in particular on the boards, so please don't take it as such because it's not intended that way at all.
But I'm curious to understand the mentality behind when and where rape and abortion became the norm, an in-joke, something that it's perfectly okay to laugh about in every day circumstances.
I think I've said in the past that I lost my virginity through rape - and though I don't think I'm particularly hung up about it (I didn't actually equate my own personal circumstances with that of a rape victim until recent years, so, whatever, but perhaps I do have hang-ups, who is to say?), and have had normal sexual relationships ever since then, that doesn't mean to say that others can let that sort of thing pass them by so easily. One thing is for sure though. Young people are vulnerable. I don't think it's acceptable for rape of a woman to be an in-joke when they're taken advantage of at a young age (I was 14).
Remember your first ever sexual fumble? Fond memories? A bit embarrasing? Or something completely humiliating that you would really rather forget? You get my gist.
So - rape and abortions. Pretty easy laughing subjects?
Specifically on these boards, is it a case of that the main contributors are male, and therefore have no idea of the true impact on a rape victim? Or that of one who has had to have an abortion? Do men have any idea quite how much an abortion fucks with a woman's hormones? Makes you near-suidical. Not from personal experience- have been fortunate enough not to be in that position. But this is fact.
Or is it just fucking "funny" - like being bum-raped by a gay man is also funny?
You tell me - tell me your thoughts.
I'm probably a good ten years older than the majority of posters on here (sorry for being mother), so I guess I'd just like to understand the mentality of it all.
And then wup your fucking arses. :)
a bit heavy for 1am?
yah.
p.s
i thought this was going to be
"if you got raped and got pregnant, would you have an abortion?"
Same!
I think I would.
^ joke about abortion
That's one of the reasons I am on the pill.
That kind of shit would just completely mess with your head.
What sort of life would a child of a rapist have anyway, growing up to know that daddy was a fucking cunt?
To be fair, I think that if you were going to have the child
that was due to a Rape, to tell the child he/she was the result of a rape would be totally unfair.
I wouldn't because
it would take after the father either a lot of quite a bit, and my child would be a criminal/rapist type of person. Nature would win over there.
*wouldn't keep it
hi
i don't find these jokes funny. and i have noticed them alot on here, especially recently. it's pretty immature.
see also: jokes about anorexia and bullimia
and also crass things about sex.
i just ignore it rather than making an issue of it though.
there's alot of bollocks on these forums so i'd spend all day having a go at people if i ever started.
*crass misogynistic things about sex
wow, this conversation with myself is pretty rad.
rape/abortion jokes are one thing
but getting upset at "crass" jokes about sex? Now that's too far imo
crass MISOGYNISTIC things about sex
funnily enough misogyny in any form bothers me.
hehe
I will join in with your chattin to ya self if you like...
I feel the same about the anorexia stuff and that too, as I know people who have been thru it and it was so tough on then that they still strugle at times bless um.
I also usualy ignore it, and move on. man I cant be arsed to fihgt the whole internet land
innit
i've thought before about being all like "DNT JOKE ABOUT EEATIING DISORDERS Y'LL MAKE ME CRY" but then i realised that some 19 year old boy chump'd just be like LOL YR FAT or something. dis is so cool.
yeah
you cant really make people stop that kinda thing some times you just have to deal with it diffrently and step away.
i think there's a DiS competition to be as irreverent as possible
and there's a general sense of complacency, like 'Hey, we're just wet indie boys who wouldn't even know how to speak to a girl, let alone...' I'm pretty sure that thread could only have been a late-night one, as well.
Abortion doesn't make people near-suicidal, in all cases. I think the alternative would be far worse!
"Abortion doesn't make people near-suicidal"
You have a lot of personal experience with this?
yeah, actually
any evidence any one of us is going to
contribute w.r.t. abortion is only anecdotal. but considering that generations of the medical profession have been happy with abortion as a safe option, despite society's discontent, suggests that it's pretty manageable emotionally.
girls that i know who've had one have come out fine but evidently you've seen different.
rape. i don't know. the jokes are thoughtless not vindictive. i haven't read the boards enough but the banter is violent in all directions, not just against women...
Isn't it just
'kidz' being whacky and carazay on the internet cos there is the safety of distance and anonymity? I get the feeling that there is much method trolling on here....stuff designed to be controversial but mocked up as humour. Number of people making rape 'jokes' in real life = none as far as I'm aware.
Really?
Have u heard 9 out of 10 people enjoy gang rape *thats a very common joke in the real world*
My real world
could well be entirely different to yours. With gang rape being a semi-regular occurrence near my Uni (male or female victim) it was a taboo subject. I understand it is considered crass, tasteless and uncouth in polite society too.
Semi-regular occurence?
Gang rape?
Where do you live some sort of politically unstable third wor-
Oh right Glasgow. No, I totally understand now.
(not a rape joke, its a Glasgow joke)
this^
i've never heard any drop a rape or abortion joke down at the pub having a nice drink.
people get away with saying anything on the internet because they know they'll never meet the person they're "joking around with" (abusing)
^ I have met people I have joked around and abused
As have most people on here
yeah, but there are jokes
and friendly abuse with people you've known a long time/all your life when you're by yourselves and there is dropping a complete clanger when in the company of people you dont know *that* well.
That can be quite funny, though
I aint a fan of them kinda jokes
in general having known peeps who have gone thru it, it makes me kinda uneasy when I hear it used light heartedly.
Nah, not at all funny.
There's just lots of silly young boys around here.
In my opinion
nothing should be sacred in the sense that jokes are forbidden about it.
^ This
get a better username, fucking twat
There was just a post deleted from here.
CENSORSHIP OMG!!
yeah
it wasn't an especially nice post.
No. It was a horrible post.
But deleting it goes against the person who said its whole argument in this thread.
It's not up to you to make those decisions for people when so many nasty posts go unnoticed when they're not directed at an acquaintance of yours.
well
someone asked for it to be deleted.
Completely agree
I'd go further. Nothing CAN be.
God forbid
you should ever be in the situation where you and your gf would have to make a decision.
oh - hang on - pigfoot + gf. mind explodes.
you little cunt.
You've fundamentally missed
the point both me and fullerov were making. Is it standard policy for you to shout and get angry when you don't understand something?
No, I think you
missed the fundemental point here.
I've only really known you for a short time on the boards, but what I do know about you is that you seem to get off on fucked up issues.
I do apologise for my impertenance as you are all walking cocks, but you do realise that women think differently?
I'll also assume that you're straight. Straight women appreciate men who understand issues.
Am I getting through to you? Do I need to be more patronising?
Is your point that
you will withold sex from Pigfoot_ until he agrees with you? I don't get it.
now why doesn't that surprise me
throw in a sarcastic comment or two. got any substance behind it? or are you just as thick as pigshit?
Bit of a false dichotomy there Mirri
Look: I understand you have a very sensitive personal perspective on this issue. Its just, as Pigfoot_ says below, EVERYTHING has to be fair game for humour. You might not find such humour funny. Such humour might, in fact, not be funny in any way. But you can't STOP people joking about it, because they will anyway. Its one of the main ways people deal with things. It just is.
Pigfoot is barely past a child, whilst I may not like him, I don't hate him.
and how old are you?
And, in bringing the 'I'm older than you
so my opinions are worth more than yours' argument, you've ticked off the final box in the 'uber-spazz' handbook.
By ticking the
"my opinions are worth more than yours" box, AND then getting all indignant about it, you're just proving yourself to be the little immmature retard that you are, Pigfoot.
I don't think my opinions are worth than yours
and you've been far more indignant in this thread than I have. So pot kettle black.
*more
Tell me that in twelve year's time
youth is a great thing, arrogance is not. Learn the fucking difference.
12
What fucked-up issues?
Pray tell.
Look, my point in this thread was EVERYTHING has to be fair game for humour. From the holocaust to child abuse. Denying any subject can be joked about is to me a very dangerous, unhealthy thing. I didn't say I found rape/holocaust/whatever jokes amusing. I just said they need to be able to exist. For that, I got a barrage of abuse.
I understand issues (though I'm not going to present a version of myself for the benefit of potential sexual partners). Understanding issues and disagreeing with you are not mutually exclusive.
So, basically what you are doing
is understanding issues, and realising that they may have an impact in the future, but choosing to withhold those opinions on these boards because going with the mainstream gets more LOLs.
Because it suits your jokey persona - because you feel that you can get away with it while you still have the time to get away with it without a gf, after all, your future gf surely won't know about your DiS life.
So you are basically being a cunt until someone comes into your life that you love enough and respect her saying "grow up" and you actually take notice of it.
Or you will be alone for years until you make that decision for yourself, because most women can't be bothered with the effort of you.
Yeah. Well good luck with that. With your sort of attitude, you'll be lucky if you jump the first fence.
Well done
You successfully managed to avoid addressing a single point I made and brought it back to your comfort level.
Fair enough.
I have only one point of yours that I can be bothered to address. Everything is not fair game. Internet life versus real life is not a game that you can play at your own will in the relative comfort of your own bedroom. Internet personas versus real life personas are not something that I find entertaining or amusing.
Be yourself, or just fuck off. If your personality is so dull that you have to make a new one just for the internet, you should stick to IT forums.
Not ones where dicussions about real life issues like rape and abortion are taking place.
Everything is fair game
Not just for the internet. For the television, for stand-up comedians and for the man in the street. It's not about people having the right to offend you. If someone made a joke about what happened to you, that would be terrible and I would not defend that. However, with things like rape and murder, the very darkest aspects of human nature, humour is the only thing that can help a lot of us deal with their existence. This isn't a renegade personal belief. It's a pretty commonly held view among psychologists. I'm not going out of my way to offend you. I don't want to. I'm just giving you my take on how dark humour works and the role it plays in society.
As for your other points, I am myself (whatever that means) all the time. There have been times in my life I have performed for the benefit of other people. I found it made me unhappy. I don't do it anymore.
Im not so sure about this
on another day I might make the same argument, but actually in the majority of cases, these jokes come from a place of extreme detachment (at least from the situation) where the notion of "anything is fair game" seems more an expression of belligerence and self-indulgence, than challenging taboos and (rightfully) opposing a society that seems to love getting offended, or using humour as a way of overcoming hardship or suffering. That last part is particularly important, as something like a sense of freedom in this situation is often thrust upon others in a rather cowardly way (whilst at the same time being, largely, a truism). I think its very easy to trot out a noble and justifiable argument in order to make up for an impulse that is a lot more base and irresponsible.
And Carlin certainly did not make rape funny. But then George Carlin is about as funny as rape.
I dont think Im being clear
obviously Im up for most kinds of schadenfreude that you can possibly imagine, but as most people point out, but unless its done well (and at least with some kind of point other than reckless "liberation"), its often not very funny, and I certainly wouldnt thrust the argument of the therapeutic quality of humour onto somebody who has been directly affected by the "joke". That might sound cowardly itself, but I do think you have to be compassionate (God I sound like a Christian)
minus the second "but"
out of curiosity
why do you think not joking about sensitive subject matters would be unhealthy.
I think not allowing it is unhealthy
Denying people the ability to release their emotions on particular subjects via humour.
I'm all up for freedom of speech
peeps can make jokes about it if they like. I just wont find um funny most probibly.
There is a real debate to be had
about freedom of speech issues,agreed. I just find it in bad taste/insensitive to make jokes about something that may have happened to anyone you talk to and may still affect them.
ie
any bad thing?
On the scale of things
I wouldn't suggest that jokes about stubbing your toe should be frowned upon no. Even though it does sting.Nor am I proposing some overlord banning subjects. I merely think that there are some subjects obviously more off-colour than others and people might exercise a bit of consideration around them.I'm fond of dark humour and the like but I get alarm bells ringing in my head about some topics. I don't think that is wrong as such.
true true
I find it bad taste and insensitive too.
Nice.
If you think the above is funny, rest assured, you're never sleeping on my sofa again. At least not until you fucking grow up.
Its a slippery slope though
offensive as you, or anyone, might find something, talking/joking about it shouldn't be banned, because then other people start getting all demanding and such. Just how liberalism works SOZ.
Your attitude to this debate
isn't exactly grown up itself is it? 'If you even vaguely challenge my view, I will swear at you and get irate'.
to be fair
it's on an issue which is clearly going to be pretty fucking close to her heart. probably pretty hard not to get irate. i get fucking irate at alot of things, that doesn't mean i'm not grown up.
*sorry for being so sweary
Well clearly
but just going around picking on people who disagree about one implication of her argument (not even the basic principle of it, ie: you might not think rape jokes are funny, but might still not want to, like, stop people telling them and shizzz) is the height of unmeasuredness isnit?
i think if you knew someone well enough
to let them sleep on yr sofa and then they turned around and disagreed with you on something like this you'd be pretty shocked, even if they weren't disagreeing with the founding premise of your argument. but i don't want to carry on talking for her.
Well maybe
but its not just fullerov she's yelling at.
Her point is ridiculous
If I treated it differently because she decided to disclose something that happened in her past, it would be pretty patronising of me.
no it would be NICE of you
A debate like this
is about arguments. Whether a rape victim or a rapist makes a point, it's the point I'm arguing with. And hers was ridiculous.
how does it feel...
TO HAVE NO HEART?!!!!! !!??!??!?!?