Guitars get me hard.

I like it when they're loud and it feels like they're blowing the arse off me.

I like when they kind of twinkle a bit, like a million stars shining off in the night sky.

I like when J Mascis does a solo. I jizz my pants.

I like it when Thurston Moore mashes a guitar with a screwdriver.

I don't like acoustic guitars that much. Sometimes they're alright, but I prefer the arse-blowing/twinkling of an electrified one.

So, guitars.

I suppose.

I like them when they are played conpletely clean with a little gain on them and played a million times louder than the rest of the instruments. I like them when p 90s on them and play discordant notes.

they're brilliant.

Skin is cracked and I realise
That I hate the sound of guitars.

and effected to hell so they don't sound even slightly like guitars but can still carry a melody with ease.

+ mild vibrato arm <3

My Son and I walked into a shop recently packing
cased guitars and everyone in the shop stopped talking and watched us as we walked around. My Son had his Gibson 335 in a big gibson case and finally someone came over to him and said "So, what's in the case man?". We were there to play a Vox AC 30 so out came the guitar. It's funny cause I was thinking that I felt like we were gunfighters walking into a saloon the way everything kinda got quite when we walked in.

There is a certain excitement in learning famous guitar parts and sounds but an unreal excitement in making up your own parts and creating sounds that have never been made before- as far as you know.

Guitars are family. I have every guitar I ever bought except my first electric (a Lonestar Fat Strat) which we had to trade off for something more crucial but whenever I see the guy that bought it I ask how the stratocaster is doing like it was some family member that I haven't heard from in awhile.

I love Electric Guitars pretty much exclusively and Electric guitars don't become guitars (in my book) till they are plugged into an effects loop and an amp- so I love that relationship, that's guitarness.

I love watching guitars in the hands of gifted players. The first guitar I bought was a Korean made Fender acoustic (in a pawn shop). I brought it home and played it for a few days and decided that it sounded crappy and that I should take it down to tht music shop and see if they could do something for it to make it sound better. So, I walk in and Bob comes up to me and say "Hey man, what's up?" and I told him that I just bought this guitar at a pawn shop and it sounds "a little dead". He says "Here, let me see." and he takes it and goes into about a three minute amazing rock and blues solo meltdown and that crappy, dead sounding Korean piece of shit suddenly became the coolest guitar in the world.

I love when I see famous guitars "in person". I love (at gigs) when the guitars come out; either in the hands ofroadies or (more dramatically) when they are personally escorted out by the artist when they come on stage.

I have never liked guitar executions and smashings. I thankfully have nevere seen one.

Guitar Love is rampant in my house. My Son is possessed by guitars- he is either playing them or looking at them on the internet. He has compliled an amazing wish list.

It's exciting to think that guitars are just one of a zillion different ways to make music and yet it is the lonely guitar that has risen up out of the myriad of musical instruments to become a weapon and the most recognized extension of the musical soul of the human self.

All Hail The Ax!

KEYTARS FTW

http://www.killingmylobster.com/albums/goooaal/keytars_feelin_it_copy.sized.jpg

I didn't start playing the guitar you know... At first it was the piano, because it was there, and I could pick out a tune on it.

One day I found my mum's hippy acoustic, complete with ribbons still attached. I gave it a rough tune up according to the notes my dad told me it should be, and then I managed to figure out how to play a chord on it. I didn't know what chord it was, but it sounded fucking immense, so full and round - it occupied the full range ofmy hearing and caused my body to resonate along with it. That chord was a simple Emin.

In time, I got myself an electric guitar, and then discovered the joys of thigns like distortion and fuzz. It was a pretty basic slab of wood, and the amp was nothing to write home about, but the main thing was that it sounded good, no matter what I played on it.

In time, and through various instrument and amp upgrades, I found MY guitar. I was only trying out pedals, the man asked what I normally played (a Burns Bison). They didn't have any of them, but they had one of these new ones that Burns had only just released. "That'll do me" I said, and plugged it in. It sang like a heavenly choir, it chimed like a bell, the whole thing was just... right.

There is no force on earth will ever part me from my guitar(s). I'd sooner sell my kidney on the black market.

sounds beautiful when you make the tone ring and growl back and forth. Put it through some heavy delay and it just sounds heavenly.